05-20-2014, 10:28 AM
Thank you Rowens: I liked the shape of the original poem also, some things are better, but it seems to lie flat. Loretta
Rowens: if you read the original poem out loud it's more like a story; the extra words, can be cut, but, it has to move along and not get stuck. Loretta
Rowen: I edited Edit l again. Despair; a fascinating subject, Ingmar Bergman did a film called the hour of the wolf in the 60's; it has never left my mind. The thing is, talk about being wordy; how few words can you show the experience of despair in? Loretta
Rowens: if you read the original poem out loud it's more like a story; the extra words, can be cut, but, it has to move along and not get stuck. Loretta
Rowen: I edited Edit l again. Despair; a fascinating subject, Ingmar Bergman did a film called the hour of the wolf in the 60's; it has never left my mind. The thing is, talk about being wordy; how few words can you show the experience of despair in? Loretta