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[tectak]

Tom,

"Dump it? It is your field."

2 things:

make it more clear what is happening, don't play coy by using such things as "the cure".

In terms of the narrative, do not allow the counselor to make uninterpreted statements, filter everything through the patient, e.g.,

I was talking about the guilt I felt about living when (whatever the passenger's name was), and she kept referring to her floors. Saying things like...

This is not a piece that will work well with stream of consciousness writing. It needs to be clear who is saying what. Do not try to go into the counselors head, show from the behavior, her responses, body language, etc., that she doesn't care about the patient. Filter all of this through the patient's eyes, but do so in a non-judgmental, factual way.

It's nice that you wanted to stretch in doing this piece, but my feeling is you probably lack the insight to pull it off, not because you aren't intelligent enough, but because you are lacking in experience in this area. You are able to see things superficially at best, and to me, it comes across as a lack of genuineness. I cannot imagine any counselor, regardless of how burned-out, or depressed they were, saying the things you have your counselor saying. It's not that a counselor wouldn't say crazy things, they just wouldn't say these crazy things, at least not in the way you are having them saying them.

One final thing, generally a patient doesn't have much insight into why they are feeling the way they do, especially in cases of survivors guilt, they may not even know they are depressed, just that things aren't right. Now, if you are going to start further down the road, and have the person say they are suicidal, then have them say it. That is usually going to come up during the intake, psych/social process anyway.

Anyway, there you go.

As I said the first time "2b or not 2b!"...some people just don't know a good critique when they see one

Dale

Hi dale,
Yes to all of this. I am aware of my limited insight in this area and for that reason alone I may jettison it.
The in parentheses are not the spoken word but the internal off-thinking of the counsellor, but the whole piece is written through the counsellor's silent thoughts...the device failed, obviously.
I can clearly remember, and actually witnessed this, that my departed buddy noted that the counsellor would not look him in the eye... constantly down cast eyes are very disturbing in any circumstances. The parquet floor was interesting. The rest I surmised.
Best,
tectak