Sleeping Tomb
#2
(04-26-2014, 01:41 AM)Gestalt222 Wrote:  I'm already dead,
I'm just trying to rise now.
The wind surrounds me
and howls for my surrender.
I succumbed countless moons ago,
The world too bleak, my soul too meek.

Landless peasants lived a life
I couldn't live
Their souls intact, their fight not crushed.
I mourn the lifeless body,
staggered across the seaside cliffs.
Laid upon the jagged rocks
like a sleeping tomb.

-But I still breathe.
the wind,
it swirls and
it howls
for my surrender.
Every move I make-
makes me colder,
but I still breathe.
Hello Gestalt, half of verse 3 is almost a mirror image of verse 1, exept in verse 3 you are alive, and I cannot (for the life of me) see how you got to that state when in verse 1 you are "dead".

You repeat " but still I breathe" twice in V3 which jars me, and I cannot connect the dots as to why the narrator "still breathes".

what does "the wind surrounds me and howls for my surrender" mean?

How can a "lifeless body", be "staggered" across the seaside cliffs?.

I always think of a "tomb" as being "enclosed".

The way this section is worded likens the "lifeless body" to the "sleeping tomb".

Thank you for posting.
JG
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Messages In This Thread
Sleeping Tomb - by Gestalt222 - 04-26-2014, 01:41 AM
RE: Sleeping Tomb - by John Galt - 04-26-2014, 03:44 AM
RE: Sleeping Tomb - by Gestalt222 - 04-26-2014, 04:12 AM
RE: Sleeping Tomb - by RiverNotch - 04-27-2014, 12:23 PM
RE: Sleeping Tomb - by Gestalt222 - 04-30-2014, 12:56 AM
RE: Sleeping Tomb - by aerickson - 04-26-2014, 05:00 AM
RE: Sleeping Tomb - by ralex003 - 04-28-2014, 01:14 AM
RE: Sleeping Tomb - by Willpark - 04-28-2014, 10:39 AM



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