02-21-2014, 11:13 AM
MadisonDiem:
Good point. I tend to focus too much on imagery and looking inward for the meaning, forgetting that the audience cannot read my mind, nor have the same experience I have, and thus I must be a little more clear with the point I'm trying to make.
Balding pool of yarn was the only way I could describe this patient in the psych ward, he was bald, and flimsy and almost figure-less like a pool of yarn. I've had someone point out the same way you have, though, so it's probably a good idea for me to change it.
Thanks for taking your time to look at it, it's very insightful.
Good point. I tend to focus too much on imagery and looking inward for the meaning, forgetting that the audience cannot read my mind, nor have the same experience I have, and thus I must be a little more clear with the point I'm trying to make.
Balding pool of yarn was the only way I could describe this patient in the psych ward, he was bald, and flimsy and almost figure-less like a pool of yarn. I've had someone point out the same way you have, though, so it's probably a good idea for me to change it.
Thanks for taking your time to look at it, it's very insightful.