10-12-2013, 03:36 AM
The metering is a bit off but I agree that its simple and straightforward, which can be refreshing. for the second stanza I actually suggest lenthening it with details that invoke the emotion
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Blue dot
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RE: Blue dot - by rowens - 10-03-2013, 07:47 AM
RE: Blue dot - by Malu - 10-06-2013, 02:02 PM
RE: Blue dot - by Sonata - 10-06-2013, 06:31 PM
RE: Blue dot - by Malu - 10-07-2013, 02:39 AM
RE: Blue dot - by Keith - 10-07-2013, 07:18 AM
RE: Blue dot - by jringo_ - 10-12-2013, 03:29 AM
RE: Blue dot - by RyanRader13 - 10-12-2013, 03:36 AM
RE: Blue dot - by Sonata - 10-12-2013, 08:31 AM
RE: Blue dot - by beaufort - 11-10-2013, 10:56 PM
RE: Blue dot - by rayheinrich - 11-11-2013, 05:28 AM
RE: Blue dot - by billy - 11-11-2013, 10:26 AM
RE: Blue dot - by tectak - 11-12-2013, 04:00 AM
RE: Blue dot - by killthepoet - 11-21-2013, 04:58 AM
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