Ra

[ChristopherSea]

Seamus Heaney, you say? That is quite the quill you have taken on! The flow is there, although 'machinations of a godly machine' was a stutter-step for me. It's probably machinations with machine (even though I like the word). Maybe something like, 'workings of a Godly machine.' The first line may read better as, 'Her body lies dappled in ochre-and-black' for me (in my voice). You want smoky, pertaining to smoke, not Smokey, pertaining to the Bear. You have flecked and unflecked herein. I might ditch one. What about 'smoky and marred', as I would never break that 'unslept, unkempt, unflecked' combination, ha ha. This golden gal is radiant, but I thought that RA was a male deity with the sun as his eye or body. This also creates some confusion for me (possible me alone), as she is the sun in the first 'stanza', but she steams 'from the heat of the sun' in the second part. Are the 'sun' and 'Her' one or two entities? I will have to read this again to comment further, but all in all it's a superior work. Nice!