08-01-2013, 04:48 PM
I'm not one for "list poems" either but this one has potential. My biggest beef, however, is with the last stanza. The last line is a big cliche and it damages the rest of the poem. Other than that there are some good lines, like the first and L3. I have trouble connecting with the poem however. I feel it might be too abstract, meaning there are a lot of nice words but nothing to really hold on to. I hope I don't sound too harsh because I do like this poem, but I feel it can be more.