07-31-2013, 11:17 PM
I still think the poem itself reflects the subject, and does a good job of it. It's a hackneyed, plaintive, tired sentimentalist ring to it. But it highlights those types of thoughts and feelings that people do have.
"by an artist who soon, in the open, will die",
might go too far out of frame. But I already mentioned my crude version of that line.
Plus, I know better than to think you'd pick a trite title like this lightly. So there's more to it than what its flaws suggest. But that's what I see.
"by an artist who soon, in the open, will die",
might go too far out of frame. But I already mentioned my crude version of that line.
Plus, I know better than to think you'd pick a trite title like this lightly. So there's more to it than what its flaws suggest. But that's what I see.