Tanka 21st July

[Magpie]

i think a tanka originally was just a short poem and in time became a game poem for two of more people as you state above. often it was used as a form of communication between friends or lovers.

the format like the haiku and senryu (57577)are an english idea, and it's common for them to be seen only as guidelines .

i think it's great how you cut it to it's bare bones and still retained the humour of the thing, i think the first line could be the first of the third line. but it does work well as is, i really enjoyed it. great job.

Hi Billy, thanks for the kind comments. I'm glad that I have eventually decided to leave behind the 5-7-5 shackles although it took me a while to get there, so many thanks for persevering. I didn't know about tanka being a form of communication so thanks for that info.
Mark