Play the violin again edit 2. leanne,serge.edit 1 milo,svan,rc,billy, serge et al

[serge gurkski]

don't defend what once was fine. sigh. etc.

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Play the violin again;
let hands that flit so lightly
slip a sigh.
Fold forward into flesch <<< ...into X Flesch
and scoop the ecstasy;
sweep low to bow <<< to X bow
to music’s tempting ways.
Your tender notes will soothe the strings,
I rise on softly wafting wings
in air so thin, bells scarcely ring, <<< in sigh! X_ air (finally)
but there I hear the sky. <<< I ................ hear (for godsake! yeah!)

Tectak
1992

cheers
serge

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I never said it was close to bad, your poem, did I?
Let me show you why it could be good:


Play the violin again!

Let hands that flit so lightly
slip a sigh!

Fold forward into Flesch
and scoop the ecstasy!

Sweep low to bow
to music’s tempting ways!

Your tender notes will soothe the strings.

I rise on softly wafting wings
in air so thin, bells scarcely ring:

but there I hear the sky.

---

let hands that flit so lightly slip a sigh
...
I rise on wings on air so thin
bells scarcely ring:

I hear the sky.
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Thank you for this, Tom.

Wonderful poetry.

cheers
serge