06-20-2013, 10:43 AM
Hi Leanne, thanks very much for the crit, will change the "'till" and the "which" to start with. Glad you liked the pop culture references, I feel I need to work on those if they're to be kept in the poem. I like very much the idea of describing that very tired feeling after (for me) a jog, when you're just slowly circling the block one last time before the sun sets. I think the second stanza does that well enough...need to build on it. Thanks again.