06-18-2013, 01:23 PM
Well, this is only my third poem, so I could be totally wrong about the meter. However, I've read in multiple places that iambic pentameter can be considered valid if at least three (a majority) of the feet on a line are iambic. Maybe I've scanned it too many times, but I think all the lines but one meet that criteria. Some troublesome lines:
ON a |ma TER |nal E |R BIRTH |ing BED
trochee |iamb |iamb |spondee |iamb
will NEV |er FIT? |PRINTS INKED |by LIT |tle FEET?
iamb |iamb |spondee |iamb |iamb
The invalid line:
to SAY, |"DAD dy |LOVES you, |GO in |PEACE."
iamb |trochee |trochee |trochee |(invalid)
I can easily fix the invalid line by changing it to something more personal:
to SAY, |"we LOVE |you LIN |coln, GO | in PEACE."
iamb |iamb |iamb |iamb |iamb
I'll post that revision. Any other specific lines you see a problem with?
ON a |ma TER |nal E |R BIRTH |ing BED
trochee |iamb |iamb |spondee |iamb
will NEV |er FIT? |PRINTS INKED |by LIT |tle FEET?
iamb |iamb |spondee |iamb |iamb
The invalid line:
to SAY, |"DAD dy |LOVES you, |GO in |PEACE."
iamb |trochee |trochee |trochee |(invalid)
I can easily fix the invalid line by changing it to something more personal:
to SAY, |"we LOVE |you LIN |coln, GO | in PEACE."
iamb |iamb |iamb |iamb |iamb
I'll post that revision. Any other specific lines you see a problem with?