The Little Things

[Volaticus]

while brevity can be good, we want something to stay with us after reading it. (i do anyway ) i like the 'I am' at the end, it gives me a few seconds to think about the poem and i get a feel it's an introspective of you or the 1st person liking themselves. the main problem are the cliche each line is a common phrase try and use original images (three things no one else has said)

I had a feeling it would be too little. I was aiming for simplicity, because I thought it'd fit with my theme of how the smallest things can matter a lot. But I completely get what you're saying. I have to come up with a way to say it in a more interesting way. Thanks for taking the time

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Maybe in the original language there's a nuance I'm missing. It comes across vague to me.

The original poem had some words, that I couldn't find matching English words for. Not that it should be an excuse of course I consider expanding the thought behind the poem, so it doesn't seem so flat. Rephrasing, adding a few more lines, and some depth.
I appreciate you taking the time to comment