The bride of Chenab (My first Triolet)

[billy]

hi neena, great effort.

usually the meter is iambic tetrameter
da/dum da/dum da/dum da/dum.

the refrain can be slightly altered (sometimes just by using different punctuation) which can liven the poem up a bit more.
you have the meat of the triolet in your poem so an edit shouldn't be a big one.

they get easier the more you do them like most poetry forms, they'll also help you with meter in other poems.

well done

Hi All,

Here's my first triolet and I am really really excited about it
Please do let me know how you feel about it...

The bride of Chenab

On the banks of Chenab, a bride
awaits her groom to arrive.
A time-worn bag at her side;
On the banks of Chenab, a bride
Glassy eyes, tears long dried
Holding on a hope barely alive.
On the banks of Chenab, a bride
awaits her groom to arrive.

Cheers