Past Perfect by hamartia
#7
(02-11-2013, 04:46 AM)Leanne Wrote:  After that, in love became had loved.
We passed perfect and became plural,
found safety in separate phone numbers
and the life sentence of the relative clause.

I'd like to attribute the errors to their authors,
but time and proximity have married our idioms -
you write like me and vice versa,
my turn of phrase tucked neatly into yours.

Would that we'd had an editor, we lamented,
as we dealt the crockery into two even boxes.
Someone to unsplit our infinitives,
to give the piece the body it lacked.


The original thread can be found here.
It is not that often, sadly, that a little diamond is found to have soft surfaces. This is a rare item. It speaks its truths softly, as truth should, and succeeds in saying twice as much in a whisper as it would if shouted. I hope you can write like this again. That is the wonder of poetry. Its value is not because it is rare....but because it is good.
Wonderful piece.
tectak
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Messages In This Thread
Past Perfect by hamartia - by Leanne - 02-11-2013, 04:46 AM
RE: Past Perfect by hamartia - by Todd - 02-11-2013, 04:55 AM
RE: Past Perfect by hamartia - by hamartia - 02-11-2013, 07:45 AM
RE: Past Perfect by hamartia - by Leanne - 02-11-2013, 08:02 AM
RE: Past Perfect by hamartia - by billy - 02-11-2013, 11:04 AM
RE: Past Perfect by hamartia - by serge gurkski - 02-12-2013, 01:35 AM
RE: Past Perfect by hamartia - by tectak - 02-17-2013, 05:52 AM
RE: Past Perfect by hamartia - by newsclippings - 02-27-2013, 02:32 AM
RE: Past Perfect by hamartia - by UnofficiallyMe - 03-21-2013, 12:11 AM
RE: Past Perfect by hamartia - by AlexSharp - 04-27-2013, 11:23 AM
RE: Past Perfect by hamartia - by ChristopherSea - 08-19-2013, 11:02 PM
RE: Past Perfect by hamartia - by Bemh - 12-09-2013, 08:21 AM
RE: Past Perfect by hamartia - by Todd - 02-09-2017, 02:47 AM
RE: Past Perfect by hamartia - by ellajam - 02-09-2017, 03:54 AM
RE: Past Perfect by hamartia - by Achebe - 02-12-2017, 05:55 AM
RE: Past Perfect by hamartia - by RiverNotch - 02-15-2017, 10:40 AM



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