02-08-2013, 11:29 PM
Hi Hamartia,
I loved your poem although I confess it took a few reads to understand it fully. I particularly stumbled on lines 3-4. I thought you captured quite well the attitude of mothers who hold on to children beyond the point of healthy. The tree analogy works very well throughout the poem, so I was distracted a bit when you introduced the papery lobes and earring bit to compare them to nuts and baubles. I also didn't understand how the title 'London Plane' tied in with poem.
Beyond that I find the peom damned fine.
Best,
I loved your poem although I confess it took a few reads to understand it fully. I particularly stumbled on lines 3-4. I thought you captured quite well the attitude of mothers who hold on to children beyond the point of healthy. The tree analogy works very well throughout the poem, so I was distracted a bit when you introduced the papery lobes and earring bit to compare them to nuts and baubles. I also didn't understand how the title 'London Plane' tied in with poem.
Beyond that I find the peom damned fine.
Best,