02-02-2013, 01:57 PM
I really appreciate the feedback! I had to utilize metaphors for a class assignment, but I was questioning the abstract nature of my images. I get feedback in my workshops a lot that my diction is too clinical and that I'm "telling", not "showing".
How did the road metaphor play out for you? I think my class is going to say its too abstract. That's why the second half is relatively fluffier.
Also, I wanted it to feel like a "blip" on the whole since it was supposed to be a moment, and the moment I was describing lasted mere seconds.
Either way, I'm glad I had you for a second
and I really do appreciate the feedback!
How did the road metaphor play out for you? I think my class is going to say its too abstract. That's why the second half is relatively fluffier.
Also, I wanted it to feel like a "blip" on the whole since it was supposed to be a moment, and the moment I was describing lasted mere seconds.
Either way, I'm glad I had you for a second
and I really do appreciate the feedback!