Educational System

[dazza]

They say that education is the key
If that's true then school is the lock
We are taught to retain the information they want us to learn
But refrain our freedom of thought.

You see there is still a divide in our schools
A better word to use is segregation
I don't mean different races black,white or asian
But between the so called fools and the smarter students
Who have the ability of information retention
Rather than ignoring the so called fools and focusing on the smart
Give them the tools to help them out of the educational dark.

Exam tests are a way of grading a students ability of retention
but what we should be testing is there ability of comprehension
rather than filling a students head with facts and figures they don't need
pass on wisdom and teach them that no matter how academically minded they are everyone has the ability to succeed.

Just because when it comes to testing a student can retain and regurgitate the things they have been taught
doesn't mean they understand the subject or have used their ability of thought.

The only thing tests can show is a student's ability to deal with stress
These are just a few of the reasons why I believe the educational system is a mess.


This is the first and only poem i have written so far. Feedback would be appreciated. Thank you

[rowens]

They say that education is the key
If that's true then school is the lock
We are taught to retain the information they want us to learn
But refrain our freedom of thought.

'refrain from' might work better. Might.


You see there is still a divide in our schools
A better word to use is segregation
I don't mean different races black,white or asian
But between the so called fools and the smarter students
Who have the ability of information retention
Rather than ignoring the so called fools and focusing on the smart
Give them the tools to help them out of the educational dark.


This reminds me of Reading Rainbow a little bit. But I like that show.

Exam tests are away of grading a students ability of retention

a way

and student's, unless you're leaving it that way intentionally.


but what we should be testing is there ability of comprehension

their

rather than filling a students head with facts and figures they don't need

student's

pass on wisdom and teach them that no matter how academically minded they are everyone has the ability to succeed.


That's right. But depending on what they want to succeed with, they will need some knowledge. Even if they learn that outside of school. Some people need to learn and experience things in different ways that aren't open to them: that's the problem. And not everyone can succeed. There's no reaching some people, and that's not always their fault.



Just because when it comes to testing a student can retain and regurgitate the things they have been taught
doesn't meant they understand the subject or have used their ability of thought.

'doesn't mean'

The only thing tests can show is a students ability to deal with stress

student's

These are just a few of the reasons why i believe the educational system is a mess.

'I'. To be consistent with the uppercase letter you used earlier in the poem.

How do you want it to read? The style and form? It seems intentional, the way you have it. But you say you hope it's not too difficult. So how do you prefer it to be?

[dazza]

They say that education is the key
If that's true then school is the lock
We are taught to retain the information they want us to learn
But refrain our freedom of thought.

'refrain from' might work better. Might.


You see there is still a divide in our schools
A better word to use is segregation
I don't mean different races black,white or asian
But between the so called fools and the smarter students
Who have the ability of information retention
Rather than ignoring the so called fools and focusing on the smart
Give them the tools to help them out of the educational dark.


This reminds me of Reading Rainbow a little bit. But I like that show.

Exam tests are away of grading a students ability of retention

a way

and student's, unless you're leaving it that way intentionally.


but what we should be testing is there ability of comprehension

their

rather than filling a students head with facts and figures they don't need

student's

pass on wisdom and teach them that no matter how academically minded they are everyone has the ability to succeed.


That's right. But depending on what they want to succeed with, they will need some knowledge. Even if they learn that outside of school. Some people need to learn and experience things in different ways that aren't open to them: that's the problem. And not everyone can succeed. There's no reaching some people, and that's not always their fault.



Just because when it comes to testing a student can retain and regurgitate the things they have been taught
doesn't meant they understand the subject or have used their ability of thought.

'doesn't mean'

The only thing tests can show is a students ability to deal with stress

student's

These are just a few of the reasons why i believe the educational system is a mess.

'I'. To be consistent with the uppercase letter you used earlier in the poem.

How do you want it to read? The style and form? It seems intentional, the way you have it. But you say you hope it's not too difficult. So how do you prefer it to be?

Thanks for your reply and pointing out the silly spelling mistakes. 1st lesson when posting proof read beforehand. The line 'pass on wisdom and teach them that no matter how academically minded they are everyone has the ability to succeed' You are correct it does depend what they what to succeed in. It was more of a personal thing i found after leaving school with no qualifications that i have learned so much more in a work environment and what i meant was just because you don't succeed in school doesn't always mean you wont succeed in the career you choose.
As for the way i wrote it i wasn't sure if it was the "correct" way a poem should be laid out if there is a correct way. Never heard of Reading Rainbow will have to google it. Guessing it's an American show. Thanks again for your comments.

[rowens]

It all depends on how you want it to come off, and whether or not you have a style or form in mind.

I have no qualifications, so I see where you're coming from.

[dazza]

It all depends on how you want it to come off, and whether or not you have a style or form in mind.

I have no qualifications, so I see where you're coming from.

I didn't really have a style or form in mind to be honest.

[rowens]

That kind of goes along with the theme of the poem. That's why I wondered whether or not some of the spelling errors were actually intentional.

[dazza]

That kind of goes along with the theme of the poem. That's why I wondered whether or not some of the spelling errors were actually intentional.

No it was just me not paying enough attention and in a rush.

[rowens]

On one hand, you could be saying that you didn't learn a lot in school, but you still know how to write, and do other things. Or you could go as far as to say that you can get by fine enough without strictly following rules of grammar and so on.

There's so many different ways some one might approach your poetry. What you're saying, what the intention of your techniques are.

But you're free to do whatever you want. Though people might get confused. This poem isn't confusing.