01-16-2013, 08:45 AM
(01-15-2013, 03:29 AM)cidermaid Wrote: Hi Kieth,Many thanks AJ have took your advice, cheers
really enjoyed this read... comfortable and comforting in the images and pictures that it brought to mind, sort of felt like a lazy weekend reminisce with some old friends, whilst wearing a boyfriend jumper and stoking the fire. (Mine's a pint of Guinness please!)
No real nits as such, perhaps a couple of the lines feel a bit over long and might benifit from a tweek.
In St1 L2 is it possible to work out a contaction with Could and have.
and in St4 L2 perhaps crossing when the gushing slows.
AJ
Keith
Guiness a meal in a glass
If your undies fer you've been smoking through em, don't peg em out