Old Guns

[tectak]

You are my comfort now, your role has changed with me.
My protection seems now to be as inconsequential too wordy and two nows in 2 lines. ...My protection is as inconsequential
as the death of a flower, the fall of a leaf, or the sound
of a gun after dark, in screaming Columbian streets. is 'of' needed?
You are by my side and that is all I can ask. feels wordy
When I was young and stood, by my choice, tall as a tree
in a desert; visible, vulnerable and yet unafraid, is and needed? this is one of those non image lines that feel like an image, i like how sounds
you were by my side. I never told you that you were my strength; i think the repetition of by my side works here because you're talking to the gun.
but I held you. I caressed you. I stripped you down
and put you together again. I knew you as well as blood.
One day, I told you, if I live too long, you will be my comfort. pretty haunting last line, it feels a bit like your friend is about to euthanase you
tectak
2012

i found it a bit too wordy in places. though i did enjoy the bond that was portrayed, and the end line was as solid as it could be.

thanks for the read

Christ! It's like fishing in a barrel tonight. I tell you no lie, billy, this one took five minutes to write as I watched the box. Some docu-shrink talking about guns being bought as a way of ensuring escape from this shitty life when you get too old to climb up a building and jump off. Have I wished you Happy New Year yet?
All your comments will be acted upon. This is terse-hearse-verse but I may extend it......if only for a raison d'etre.
Best,
tectak