The Stairs Of Caprice

[addy]

Hi Wordweaver... jumping right into the thick of it, I see . Welcome to the forums!

I really like the whimsy that threads through the piece, and the eclectic use of concepts and imagery. More than just childhood, it gave the impression of rifling through the human subconscious. What I think this could benefit from is just a tad more focus. As I said, I enjoyed how you threw in eclectic images, archetypes, and pantheons; but at some points there is an overload, where I failed grasp the significance of a certain concept's inclusion and it struck me as just a placeholder or even padding. It makes the reader's head spin, and is an interesting bauble in and of itself, but doesn't really build up or contribute to the narrative. It's good to make the reader immersed and distracted, but as the writer you can't be as clouded as us. You must be our guide.

Another thing you could improve on is the meter... the rhyming and meter seem to be inconsistent throughout, but there's just enough proper structure here that a good edit can fix that up. Otherwise, just make it a freeverse and don't bother forcing the rhymes (i really think this looks better with structure though)

That said, I enjoyed the overall reading of the piece, and the inclusion of Jareth tickled me to no end

Away in the woods, a winding path stood.
A staircase, ascending to somewhere.
These flights of steps, these flighty stairs,
I wandered, leads me where? For me the rhyme of "somewhere" and "where" is quite forced, and by extension the stanza reads as unnecessarily coy

Cross the Threshold of Yesteryears,
to the Grand Porticoes of Tomorrow.
Braced by Pillars of Virtue’s Tears,
and the heartstrings of sorrow. "Sorrow' is the only one that isn't architectural... significance?

Behold!
Its golden welcome stands sublime,
The Temple of Anamnesis.
Afterthoughts, suspended in time.

Neath its cornice Cove of Wonder,
bares the winged Sphere of Athor.
The crest of the primordial mother,
whose legends, myths and lore,
suckled upon her shore. I like the buildup, and I like this line

Cloaked in the shadows of lost and found,
Lures the Labyrinth of Jareth.
Where endless tunnels of roundabouts,
and pitfall drops, abound.

Lose yourself in the Chamber of Hushed,
the Archives of Anonymity.
Here ancient stories are whispered,
in unspoken secrecy. they are whispered, not unspoken

Roam the Rooms of Riddles, with bolted doors, unsolved.
Pirouette down the Spinning Ballrooms,
and dance, dance, dance, on the polka-dotted floors. Not sure why you chose the polkadots as an image here... does it denote confusion? Or is it meant to look like an optical illusion.

Wait up by the Room of Impatience,
or behind the “rooms to grow”.
Listen in the Room of Silence,
that echoes “I don’t know..” Again, this part seems so different. The vibe now reminds me of a claustrophobic school (the type where students are seen and not heard)

Stray up, along the Corridor of Sacred Passage,
Pass the roaring Halls of Fame.
Or Down the Avenue of Bane Knowledge,
Walled, in whimpering shame.

Ingress pride and honor, climbs up the Turrets of Conceit.
Spiraling down vainglorious, stumbled potholes of deceit.

Out onto the garden, strewn wild, with reckless dreams,
Misled tall and overgrow, are the weeds of illusive schemes.

Beware! Beware! Up and down the stairs!

Enter the Galleries of Phantom Faces,
meet faes in petticoat silks and laces.
Statuette Busts of Prophetic Sages,
of heroes and villains, down the ages.
Caricatures of man, creatures from Pan. Quite like this stanza

Homes of strangers feigned familiar, mystic dens quite peculiar!
Covens of Aragon, Crystal Realms of Paragon,
Phoenix nests and dragon lairs, even sanctuaries,
to abandoned teddy bears. Teddy bears seems out of place? But perhaps that's just me

Away in the woods, a winding path stood.
A staircase, ascending to nowhere.
These flights of steps, these flighty stairs of promise-
I now know, leads somewhere.

It beckons a choice -
Crossroads of childhood or a jaded voice.

I know who I am and I know my heart,
As sure as Pied Piper, piped the portals apart.

I’m holding the key,
Unbarring the gate,
Up the flighty steps of fancy. This is a small nit, but you already entered the sanctuary (as you established in the beginning of the poem) and there wasn't a locked gate before? Granted this is all metaphorical, so it's just a minor distraction

I’m late! I’m late! Not a moment’s tarry,
to my rendezvous with fate.
Up the steps, I shall venture with ease, The first three lines of these stanza aren't strictly necessary... the end of the previous stanza flows well to the next line
with a hop skip and jump,
up the stairs of caprice.