Cuckoo Haiku 2
#1
Cuckoo Haiku 2

Contend you not with
buds that burst anew in Spring.
Same leaves grow each year.
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#2
(03-18-2014, 07:33 AM)tectak Wrote:  Cuckoo Haiku 2

Contend you not with
buds that burst anew in Spring.
Same leaves grow each year.

Contempt you have
for exploding leaves
and contending dales
My new watercolor: 'Nightmare After Christmas'/Chris
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#3
(03-18-2014, 08:53 AM)ChristopherSea Wrote:  
(03-18-2014, 07:33 AM)tectak Wrote:  Cuckoo Haiku 2

Contend you not with
buds that burst anew in Spring.
Same leaves grow each year.

Contempt you have
for exploding leaves
and contending dales

I am sure I do not know what you meantongueincheek
Best,
Tom
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#4
B-b-bison Breath!
My new watercolor: 'Nightmare After Christmas'/Chris
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#5
(03-18-2014, 06:17 PM)tectak Wrote:  
(03-18-2014, 08:53 AM)ChristopherSea Wrote:  
(03-18-2014, 07:33 AM)tectak Wrote:  Cuckoo Haiku 2

Contend you not with
buds that burst anew in Spring.
same leaves grow each year.

Contempt you have
for exploding leaves
and contending dales

I am sure I do not know what you meantongueincheek
Best,
Tom

Contend you not with
buds that burst anew in Spring.
the same leaves grow each year

and fall in fall
a fearful sight these heady hills
eroded down to desolate, dismal dales
                                                                                                                a brightly colored fungus that grows in bark inclusions
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#6
(03-18-2014, 08:29 PM)crabboy Wrote:  Hello I am new to these forums and i am looking for some constructive criticisms on one of my first Haiku's:

The air is empty
the motorway congested
who recalls the bee

what do you think?

Crabboy, you should post your poem as a new thread in this forum for proper attention.
My new watercolor: 'Nightmare After Christmas'/Chris
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#7
(03-19-2014, 12:37 AM)entwife Wrote:  
(03-18-2014, 07:33 AM)tectak Wrote:  Cuckoo Haiku 2

Contend you not with
buds that burst anew in Spring.
Same leaves grow each year.
nice haiku, I'd drop the periods and capitals, they break the 'one breath' flow.

I KNOW you wouldSmile I took two breaths!
Best,
tectak.

(03-18-2014, 07:13 PM)rayheinrich Wrote:  
(03-18-2014, 06:17 PM)tectak Wrote:  
(03-18-2014, 08:53 AM)ChristopherSea Wrote:  Contempt you have
for exploding leaves
and contending dales

I am sure I do not know what you meantongueincheek
Best,
Tom

Contend you not with
buds that burst anew in Spring.
the same leaves grow each year

and fall in fall
a fearful sight these heady hills
eroded down to desolate, dismal dales
Are we talking lingua in maxilla here? I was.Smile
Best,
tectak
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