How They Ply;

[billy]

The river Clyde, an open vein;
and barges heavy, bring the coal
to be unloaded by the crane.
The river Clyde, an open vein,
it runs through Glasgow with the grain
to fill a dinner plate or bowl,
the river Clyde, an open vein
and barges heavy bring the coal.

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An attempt at a triolet. Learn about the triolet here feedback welcomed

i wanted to put 'like a train' on L5 but felt it was too cliche and a bit silly. still pondering it though

[Leanne]

Nope, don't do it -- L5 is fine as it is

L3 has a lot of fillers -- you could try "to unload with the (something) crane" -- the (something) is obviously a two-syllable adjective but I can't think of anything just now.

I like the refrains a lot.

Not super keen on L6 -- maybe something about "for porridge, plate or dinner roll"?

Triolets are nowhere near as easy as they look, the little buggers

[billy]

they're definitely not as easy as they look. will look to an edit tomorrow Leanne, thanks for the feedback.