(06-07-2016, 10:49 AM)shemthepenman Wrote:  I saw a milk bottle; The Dickinsonian in me demands an em dash over the semicolon -- and, really, the semicolon makes these two lines, in narrative well-connected but in idea (the earlier's description, the other's melodrama) truly disparate, too close. 
almost missed it!
on the bloody old page 
of a neutron bomb book. I'm not sure what a neutron bomb book is, exactly, but "bloody" made me think of actual blood, "almost missed it" was given to me with too sly a smile to be ignored, and "milk bottle" made me think of Jocasta -- that is to say, judging by the title, you really do mean some sort of nonsense here, but it's nonsense I love anyway. And all in the best font, too! Well, all except for the title...

(06-07-2016, 06:49 PM)RiverNotch Wrote:  

(06-07-2016, 10:49 AM)shemthepenman Wrote:  I saw a milk bottle; The Dickinsonian in me demands an em dash over the semicolon -- and, really, the semicolon makes these two lines, in narrative well-connected but in idea (the earlier's description, the other's melodrama) truly disparate, too close. 
almost missed it!
on the bloody old page 
of a neutron bomb book. I'm not sure what a neutron bomb book is, exactly, but "bloody" made me think of actual blood, "almost missed it" was given to me with too sly a smile to be ignored, and "milk bottle" made me think of Jocasta -- that is to say, judging by the title, you really do mean some sort of nonsense here, but it's nonsense I love anyway. And all in the best font, too! Well, all except for the title...