I've seen some recent discussions about lines and line breaks, and thought maybe we could post some ideas about what makes a line or a line break good. There's a lot of subjectivity, but I remember when I started writing I would free write and just break haphazzardly whenever the whim struck me. It took a number of years to learn to be more deliberate. Here are my basic rules for free verse lines (which you can always break but I find to be mostly true):

First and Last Lines are generally the most important.

With a story you need to hook them from the first three pages with a poem it's usually just the first line. If the line doesn't draw them in it's not a good line. With the last line it can't fall flat there has to be a payoff to the reader for sticking with you.

In my opinion: Often your best line or one of your best lines at least should be the first line in your poem. Construct your poetry to grab the readers attention always.

Avoid non-poetic pedestrian lines

I'm not saying be poetic for poetic sake--that can come across as pompous. I mean make your writing mean something. I've seen lines like:

The car made noise.

Really? There are no interesting details there. It isn't a surprising observation. It's forgetable shorthand. When we attempt to just pass on information the line tends to fall flat.

The lines need to contribute to the tone and mood of the poem

Every aspect of a poem should be deliberate, and since lines are the building blocks of poetry they need to be structured to convey mood. If the poem is meant to be low-key and languid. The lines should be longer to slow the pace. Is it fast and frenzied then enjamb, strip out punctuation possibly.

The line needs to be able to stand alone as it's own separate unit

The car
made noise

In this sad example, the car does not in any way hold its own on the line. While I hate the car made noise for the previously mentioned reasons, many times you'll see line breaks like this where the car sits alone and is not in any way a unit of thought. The person is writing as though they had a stutter. Lines need to have enough in them to hold together. For that reason, it is rare for one word lines to work. When they do it's because they fit so well into the mood of the poem.

Here's an example of a section of a poem where one word lines work (and it was hard to find an example):

Here's a few lines from the poem Slow Drivers by Gerald Barrax:

...they bait
your fury
and impatience across double lines
into blind
curves
making you wait
wait
wait
wait

Curves wouldn't work if it wasn't playing off of blind and the repetition of wait works because it goes back to the ultimate point of the poem.

Each line needs to contribute to the whole, but still hold some independant force in its own right.

There should be a typical line length in your poem

You should refer to a model line length and then know why you are putting a slow line (longer line) or a fast line (shorter line) into the poem.

As far as line breaks go:

Generally your lines should end on important words

These tend to be verbs and nouns. These do not tend to be prepostions or conjunctions. It's not that you can't break on all parts of speech some just tend to be much stronger than others.

Break your lines where they are the most interesting

Does a break allow you to give the reader a double meaning? Does it add a nuance to the line that wouldn't exist without the break?

Example:

I use my work because it comes to mind faster not because it's sublime. Here's a strophe from a poem I wrote to show you what I mean.

Old pleasure is a faded stage
bouquet of plastic flowers,
a dehydrated dove.
Magic’s raw essence is misdirection

Focus on the first two lines there. Line one tells you that old pleasure is a faded stage the line is enjambed though so it also reads that old pleasure is a faded stage bouquet of plastic flowers. This is an example of layering with your line breaks. It sets up a sort of resonance in your poem when you do that (I can provide examples that are not me but I'm typing quick to get this all in ).

Your breaks should give the poem momentum and move the reader to the next line

Those are probably my main thoughts about lines and line breaks.

What are some of things the rest of you think about as you put your lines together?

Any good ideas you'd like to share?

Thanks all,

Todd

Very glad to see this post! You answered a lot of questions I had and probably saved me a lot of googling and browsing in the Reference section. Many thanks.

No problem AA. Glad it was helpful for you.

I second every point you've made, Todd, and will chime in later with a few concrete examples when time permits.

Just one thing that comes to mind immediately -- consider what happens if you break a line on a preposition/conjunction. The reader knows there's more to follow, and it can build anticipation, especially when used with white space (blank bits of the page). Lines ending in a prep/conj hang in space, and sometimes that's a very valuable tool. Sadly, it can be easily overused and most often is. Variety is key to line breaks in free verse, as you don't have the bones of a proven form to help prop your words up.

Leanne,

True. Every rule is a guideline. I mostly see the preposition/conjunction breaks done by people who are doing it by "gut feel". It's one of the classic know the rule before you break it thing. Everything has to be a deliberate choice. It may turn out to be a poor choice but it should always be a choice. I do like the white space thing sort of an extended stanza/strophe break. There are times that that can be really effective. I think you're dead on on variety. You need to try to be surprising. If your reader can be lulled and they begin reading your poem like its a long car ride and they can't remember the last ten miles than you've lost something important.

hi Todd good read, and it makes a lot of sense. for me enjambment is an uber part of poetry.

your example;
Here's a few lines from the poem Slow Drivers by Gerald Barrax:

...they bait
your fury
and impatience across double lines
into blind
curves
making you wait
wait
wait
wait

for me
into blind only works because of the line below it, not because of the line above it; and i think it should. as curve works off the line above it, so should 'into blind' (obviously this is my objective point of view) i do think a line that doesn't work on it's own needs to be anchored to the line above it and 'into blind' isn't

i agree about ending on an important word. so often i see rafts of it's and and's etc at the end of lines that really need to be on the next line. of course there are and has to be exceptions when they can and should be line end words; though a lot less frequently than how we see new poets use.

one point i would make is the overly use of ; and --
i'll be honest and own up to sometimes going over board with the ;'s. for me these are the two most demonic pieces of grammar we use and as such should only be used when really needed, specially the --. evil little fucker that it is.
(jmo)
anyway, great post Todd.

Ha ha well, either way we think the line works. Good points Billy! I am a user of this damn thing

(--) I'm trying to recover.

what about the way some use a white space between each line.

for me it often (not always) detracts from the reading of the poem
the poem line should end and the next line begin on the next line.
the whit space should, like the --'s be used sparingly and only when needed.

an example of when to use such space would be leanne's poem; she the night.
where it was used at the end to create an effect.
other than that steer clear of them

Yeah, again as long as you're making deliberate choices with white space. It may turn out it isn't effective in your particular poem, but you don't know till you try. It's when you do it because you feel like hitting hard returns for awhile sort of Edgar Cayce hearing a tapping message from beyond that you get into trouble. If someone asked you: why the white space? you should have an answer that's better than um it felt right.

White space is the written equivalent of silence. Depending on what it's bracketed by, it can be expectant, soothing, or ominous (or probably any number of other things we associate with silence). Line breaks, stanza breaks and white space in a poem are also forms of punctuation.

Aside from the regular uses of punctuation that we learn from writing prose, punctuation in poetry helps dictate pace. When read aloud, the pauses will be in pretty much this order:

regular line break
line break with comma
line break with semi-colon or em-dash
line break with colon
line break with full stop
stanza break
white space

(take out the "line break" parts and you have the same effects for caesura ie. pauses within a line)

(09-22-2011, 07:49 AM)Leanne Wrote:  White space is the written equivalent of silence. Depending on what it's bracketed by, it can be expectant, soothing, or ominous (or probably any number of other things we associate with silence). Line breaks, stanza breaks and white space in a poem are also forms of punctuation.

Aside from the regular uses of punctuation that we learn from writing prose, punctuation in poetry helps dictate pace. When read aloud, the pauses will be in pretty much this order:

regular line break
line break with comma
line break with semi-colon or em-dash
line break with colon
line break with full stop
stanza break
white space

(take out the "line break" parts and you have the same effects for caesura ie. pauses within a line)

Good information Leanne. I have never given an em-dash or colon any more weight than a comma. I didn't consider them equal to a period but thought that they were all sort of a half pause addition. Do you think, the I'm guessing 3/4 pause, is the standard for this other punctuation?

Possibly, Todd. The differences are miniscule but, as you know, in poetry any tiny little squiggle can be important

Many people these days seem quite opposed to end-line punctuation, or indeed any punctuation in poetry. This bothers me a little. Why discard an entire system just to please the Pound/cummings clones? Having said that, I like a good clean punctuation-free poem as well, but like line breaks, it should be for a reason and never just arbitrary.

what i find a little odd;
some poets use a cap on every line and never use anything at line end?

That's the lazy Microsoft Word auto-replace for you -- caps, like anything else in a poem, should be deliberate.

Bumping this up as it answers a few questions that have arisen lately.

Someone told me once that you should have every line break point to the central metaphor. I kind of dismissed it at the time as impossible but I think now that ideally this is true.

(10-26-2013, 11:57 PM)milo Wrote:  Someone told me once that you should have every line break point to the central metaphor. I kind of dismissed it at the time as impossible but I think now that ideally this is true.

That would be cool. I'll have to try for that milo. I think it would be hard to do, but worth it the closer you could get to pulling it off. That view would almost always fix it so you did your breaks on important words. There aren't many central metaphors that use "and" as a pointer.

(10-27-2013, 12:03 AM)Todd Wrote:  

(10-26-2013, 11:57 PM)milo Wrote:  Someone told me once that you should have every line break point to the central metaphor. I kind of dismissed it at the time as impossible but I think now that ideally this is true.

That would be cool. I'll have to try for that milo. I think it would be hard to do, but worth it the closer you could get to pulling it off. That view would almost always fix it so you did your breaks on important words. There aren't many central metaphors that use "and" as a pointer.

If you read along the end words of what I write, that is pretty much what I shoot for with my breaks.

I'm off to analyze my breaks. Thanks

My next poem will open and close with the lines:

The car
made noise
It was awesome