Not before time. ( Ruby.1918-2013)

[tectak]

You need not speak, my old scottish mother: just lay quiet and still.
Let the duck-down night caress you, let the black-breath breezes chill.
Death, a dream of silent transit, an ice-ringed moon in sighing sky,
is yours to grasp when you are ready, only you choose when to die.

You need not speak, my old scottish mother. Just lay quiet and still.

Feb.26th.
2013
tectak

[billy]

ruby would love this poem,
i'm quite comfortable giving honest feedback on personal poems though it can be hard at times,
thanksfully i like all of this one. the 2nd line is a treat. it feels so comforting.
there's a good feel of family about the piece as well.

thanks for the read.

[tectak]

ruby would love this poem,
i'm quite comfortable giving honest feedback on personal poems though it can be hard at times,
thanksfully i like all of this one. the 2nd line is a treat. it feels so comforting.
there's a good feel of family about the piece as well.

thanks for the read.

Thanks billy. Crematorium in an hour. I am fine....so far.
Best,
Tom

[Stalker]

I very much like the simplicity of this - I am sorry for your loss TekTac

[tectak]

I very much like the simplicity of this - I am sorry for your loss TekTac

Thanks stalker.
She was a simple soul.
Best,
tectak

[billy]

><

[Leanne]

It is beautiful.

This is serious critique, I know... but every word has been considered and you've clearly rolled them all around in your head before committing to paper (or whatever). The meter is spot on, the long lines are soothing, the alliteration is just enough and no more. The only thing I would suggest is a semi-colon instead of a comma after "ready" in L4.