Ho! Ho! Ho!

[billy]

trees, something, relax, old, written, trick, castles, die, year, new

We never had a Christmas tree
though dad fooled us with a dead branch
one year; how we larfed when we saw it.
Dad died in the January,
old age they said.
empty booze bottles told us something different
he was 42, I think it was a trick to console us.
Now if they'd said his liver died of old age?

I found the written note he'd left behind,
it said:
1 bottle of Smirnoff.
1/2 bottle of johnny Walker.
8 Heineken's
2 pkt's jaffa cakes.
he said the jaffa cakes helped him relax:
I carry it still.

Each year me and my kids build
a castle with jaffa cake pkt's
at the base of the fir tree,
and I tell them all about their granddad.
On New years morning, after Santa had been
we'd sit and eat the castle walls.

[nothing_good16]

This was well written. I like the way you portrayed the mood. I especially like the transition between the first and second stanzas. The question seems a tad joking and then the second stanza gets back to the matter at hand

[benthejack]

That was really awesome,
I definitely got a strong sense of "wistful but only bit sad from a distant memory".

I don't really understand how you build your poems without overt rhyme, and how you choose your structure. You do it well.
I appreciate the subtlety here, it isn't strongly spoken but perfectly conveys emotive qualities that are difficult to elicit.

Do you have any threads/resources/suggestions a part from reading lots of poetry? (sorry to hijack your thread with a question!)

[billy]

it's miscellaneous, hijack away .
in truth i have no idea
i think many would see this one as prose more than poetry.
i tend to lie a lot (to myself) and make the lie feel truthful.
i'm not sure overt rhyme is a pre requisite for poetry.

try read through some of the important threads in the novice section. and reading and listening to some of the audio poetry we have in Audio Poetry and Podcasts forum.
try and write a few yourself. one of the best ways is to comment (as you have here) on someone elses poem, ask questions in the discussion forums as well, i know it's hard but try and immerse yourself in poetry in general.
thanks for the kind words.