A secret remarkably cunning.

[Thomas.c.Batten]

There is a secret about a hidden door,
a secret remarkably cunning,
a deceptive looking ordinary door,
which unopened will leave you mulling.
There is a secret about a hidden door,
wickedly I tell you as no fool,
the conclusion will leave you wondering,
if there was any such door at all.

[Todd]

Hi Thomas,

There's something quirky about your work that appeals to me. Your concept is cool. I feel like I want you to pare this down a little though to bring it out more. Some of the repetition doesn't feel like it's working in my opinion. Comments below:

There is a secret about a hidden door,--good opening a secret always can draw you in
a secret remarkably cunning,--I'd consider cutting this. The title already says this and it feels like you need to move to the door first
a deceptive looking ordinary door,--maybe deceptively and cut looking
which unopened will leave you mulling.--this feels awkward
There is a secret about a hidden door,--it may be just me but I don't like the repetition
wickedly I tell you as no fool,
the conclusion will leave you wondering,
if there was any such door at all.--I don't mind the last line it's not a bad twist. Where I'm having an issue is that I think you skimped on the build up for the payoff. There needs to be more of a reveal and then the issue with the door maybe not existing will pop more

Just my thoughts. I hope some of it will be of use to you.

Best,

Todd