Love At First Sight

[Wo_ozz]

I often hear about love at first sight..
Some people like to believe it's the only kind of love that will forever last.
But isn't becoming infatuated with someone at eye contact like handing your soul to the devil without a signed contract?

I don't know much about love,
But at some point everybody gets that one feeling that they can't get rid of.
All it takes is one person to make you feel fragile,
And like Sean Kingston said, a beautiful girl could have you suicidal.

I remember that night, when she caught my attention spontaneously..
She had the ability to excite and give me stage fright simultaneously.
I thought if i approached her and played my cards right, maybe she'll be mine..
Or at least i might stay on her mind overnight, but i figured she was probably too smart to fall for my punch line.

You can say she had my mind gone from the start and a simple "hello" from her would've been the correct cure.
Or maybe she'll resent me and that'd be too much pain for the heart,
But i won't stop trying until i put together the perfect picture,
Where it's just me and her.

[cidermaid]

I found it hard to get into this one. I got the subject and felt you had comunicated what was on your mind, but for me I found the poem a little forced and perhaps lacking in flow.
Having said that there are some nice rhymes and good picture lines going on and I felt that you had given the subject a good now and real edge that brought the telling of the thought / remembrance alive.
I particularly liked the third stanza.

[billy]

the content is clear as is the intent within the poem but it's very wordy. Line 7 is excellent but it could do with
out the 'and like' sadly it feels alone in regards to the quality of it.