Daddy's Little Girl

[Rose Love]

*In the spirit of the personal poem Todd recently posted, I am posting one very personal one--decidedly not for the purpose of being critiqued. It's more like a "this-is-who-I-am" (or at least a "this-is-where-I-come-from") poem. Most of the poems I have written were not born from situations where I gave a toss about the literary quality. My concern was "how can I get this vast pain and confusion out of me and onto paper?"

It didn't really seem like a "fun" poem, so I didn't put it in the "just-for-fun" section.

Daddy's Little Girl

“Who could ever love this broken girl –
absurd with fear
stupid with pain...

Should this worn-out thing ever deserve love –
look at her
curled up in a bawl
on the floor...

What freak of nature could find love in his heart
for this thing?!”

Indeed, only the farthest-flung stars,
removed to the Edge of Night
could ever look upon her
through a sparkling tear of compassion.
For only they, in their own dark solitude,
have lived in the depths of her anguish.

[Keith]

Very powerful, thanks for sharing

[Leanne]

Oh.

Very powerful buildup, and a heartrending finish.

[Rose Love]

Thanks.

I think I wrote it last year, after a healing session. It is just raw emotion, I didn't even try to make it into a poem, which is why it's not very good poetically and that's why I didn't want critique. I just wrote what I felt without thinking about the words. It was therapeutic.

[billy]

that's the good thing with poetry, it can be for them or for me

this is a good for me poem, thanks for sharing rose.

[nothing_good16]

I really liked the poem. I just think that there should be more description of the girl to give the reader a better view of why it's hard for her to be loved. I like how the phrases "worn-out thing" and "freak of nature" kind of described it, and they were good terms but, maybe more in depth imagery would help.....i don't know. Just my opinion. Good job though.

[arbil_poieo]

Very heart-breaking and every word feels heavy with strong emotions.