Special Sundays.

[billy]

Her smile was pure Crayola
A big broad crocodilian state
that demanded best behaviour.

A strong, strong, leathered bag
of a women who held us hard
at arms length, we'd dangle.

The furniture owned gran's house,
sock wearing chairs would growl
in the timbre of her bestowed voice.

A kitchen that was always full;
freshly filled preserve jars lined up
waiting for burial under the stairs.

Never a smack or curse left hand or lip
and no drink, but tea or bourbon crossed them.
Her breath was mint julep kisses.

[just mercedes]

Hi Billy - I love this, your grandmother? A snapshot of time and place, set in the amber of love - mint julep kisses is such a sensory hook! I've had too much to read today to give this a fair read, so I'll come back.

[billy]

thanks for the kind words jm, looking forward to you coming back
sadly no, just the type i wish i had

[just mercedes]

Her smile was pure Crayola great image of a wide grin. Period here?If comma, don't need capital in next line
A (big) broad crocodilian state the grin could be dangerous
that demanded best behaviour.I like the part-rhyme of the end syllables of Crayola and behaviour, and of state and the middle syllable of behaviour - they knit this all together really strongly.

A strong, strong, leathered bag is there another word rather than repeat 'strong'?I like 'leathered. Nice line break.
of a women who held us hard I like the tension here between held hard and arms length, also the line break
at arms length, we'd dangle. I'd use a semi colon rather than a comma
and nice rhyme hard/arms
The furniture owned gran's house, love that inversion
sock wearing chairs would growl sock-wearing?
in (the timbre of) her bestowed voice. again that nice slant rhyme with house and voice

A kitchen that was always full;
freshly filled preserve jars lined up full/filled work well together here
waiting for burial under the stairs. imagery of plenty, nice contrast with burial - and again that faintly threatening feeling

Never a smack or curse left hand or lip never/left nice rhyme
and no drink, but tea or bourbon crossed them. no comma needed here
Her breath was mint julep kisses. what a lovely image to end with - and also we're back to her lips, where we started.

[popeye]

Good one billy, a very strong matriarchal piece, had a bit of trouble with the socks, maybe to stop the chair legs scraping noisily on the floor? Thanks for the read mate

[billy]

Her smile was pure Crayola great image of a wide grin. Period here?If comma, don't need capital in next line
A (big) broad crocodilian state the grin could be dangerous
that demanded best behaviour.I like the part-rhyme of the end syllables of Crayola and behaviour, and of state and the middle syllable of behaviour - they knit this all together really strongly.

A strong, strong, leathered bag is there another word rather than repeat 'strong'?I like 'leathered. Nice line break.
of a women who held us hard I like the tension here between held hard and arms length, also the line break
at arms length, we'd dangle. I'd use a semi colon rather than a comma
and nice rhyme hard/arms
The furniture owned gran's house, love that inversion
sock wearing chairs would growl sock-wearing?
in (the timbre of) her bestowed voice. again that nice slant rhyme with house and voice

A kitchen that was always full;
freshly filled preserve jars lined up full/filled work well together here
waiting for burial under the stairs. imagery of plenty, nice contrast with burial - and again that faintly threatening feeling

Never a smack or curse left hand or lip never/left nice rhyme
and no drink, but tea or bourbon crossed them. no comma needed here
Her breath was mint julep kisses. what a lovely image to end with - and also we're back to her lips, where we started.

thanks jm.

i've been in a few houses where the owner was so house proud they put socks on table and chair legs to stop them scratching the floor and to stop them being scuffed by a swinging foot.
[Image: http://media.tumblr.com/tumblr_m3rf8c7iLc1qfosqa.jpg]

I was very excited putting these chair socks onto the legs as they fit perfectly!

i used strong twice for emphasis but you're probably right. my grammar sucks so i'll change that

---

Good one billy, a very strong matriarchal piece, had a bit of trouble with the socks, maybe to stop the chair legs scraping noisily on the floor? Thanks for the read mate

thanks for the feedback popeye
yeah, that and to stop the legs getting damaged.