Laika

[a vermits]

If it's an honor to be the first dog in space
I can't see it

I’d rather run with my teeth in the pre-dawn frost
fresh with the taste of rabbit
than sit still
among incidental stars.

Knowing circumstance turns its back
with the rabid mercy of wolves
moonlighting as wrecker men,
their cold noses trained for calamity.

Mongrel instinct conditioned to recognize
the yawning cracks of malevolent hands
split raw with gunpowder

Interlopers
under fur-lined jackets,

Alien hoards,
eyes: snow blind and blue

a nostolgia, this cruel labor:
an impatient whore
in her last days of
believable dress white,

and in defense
I learned Cowboy Music from stolen cable,
prayer from a collapsing lung
obedience from science
pity - I learn pity from everyone  

as she in deference
played the sun on her skin
warm, raw sandpapered skin
unable to answer a single question

or consider this  space
where the dark
sticks to your skin
like humanity
was stuck to the earth,

Oh, Laika
I’ve seen you
in the children of circumstance
in the taxes I pay, the percentage

I see you at night Laika
jester of glorious city states
in vomit stained taxi-cabs
selling charm

I see you Laika
soft on your belly

Laika
I see you underhand
I see you underfoot
I see you underground
taken care of by worms

hidden behind large paws
you never asked for
dear Laika

and to think, you once said
if creation seems fit to smile on the small
then what trouble is seven years after all?

[billy]

Now that we've got to know of your poety, please try and leave some feedback on the works of others

it feels like you have two distinct poems here and i'm not sure thats what you intended.
but they get lost as which is which. it reads as too preachy for me and has me asking; why use the dog for these profundities, or pose them as things pertaining to the dog and its life. the 1st two verse were solid then the dog becomes a vessel that can't really be sailed.
on first read it looks great then on subsequent reads it sort of deflates and makes the reader ask why?

thanks for the read.

[Erthona]

AH! To appease the Kitchen Man they needed to kill a dog for no apparent reason. I suppose dogs have been killed for much less.

RIP
Little Curly

[Image: http://www.lipizzan.com/doganim_jrt.gif]

Dale

[addy]

Urgh. Gorgeous, gorgeous poem. Has to be one of my favorite reads here, for reasons i find hard to articulate. Using the story of Laika as an interesting take on how we navigate our animal-ness within the constructs of society... a fresh and enjoyable read, for me

If it's an honor to be the first dog in space
I can't see it

I’d rather run with my teeth in the pre-dawn frost
fresh with the taste of rabbit
than sit still
among incidental stars. great stanza. I love "incidental stars". Upon first read I backtracked a little, wondering if the POV had switched to a canine one (since the first line, with its discussion of honor, is clearly human). It's an interesting creative choice that complements the existential soliloquy the poem builds itself to.

Knowing circumstance turns its back
with the rabid mercy of wolves
moonlighting as wrecker men,
their cold noses trained for calamity.

Mongrel instinct conditioned to recognize
the yawning cracks of malevolent hands
split raw with gunpowder

Interlopers
under fur-lined jackets, Is this stanza break intentional? Just curious

Alien hoards,
eyes: snow blind and blue

a nostolgia, this cruel labor:
an impatient whore
in her last days of
believable dress white, This part, though cleverly written, threw me off slightly. i had trouble fitting it into the general train of thought of the piece

and in defense
I learned Cowboy Music from stolen cable,
prayer from a collapsing lung
obedience from science
pity - I learn pity from everyone  fantastic line. Actually, fantastic lines

as she in deference
played the sun on her skin
warm, raw sandpapered skin are we talking about Laika? "sandpapered skin" intrigues me
unable to answer a single question

or consider this  space
where the dark
sticks to your skin
like humanity
was stuck to the earth, great stanza, understated and haunting

Oh, Laika
I’ve seen you
in the children of circumstance
in the taxes I pay, the percentage

I see you at night Laika
jester of glorious city states
in vomit stained taxi-cabs
selling charm I love how you progressed this. Aside from Laika (her warm animal self) being physically appropriated by the system, her iconography and myth is still consistently appropriated within the system, a metaphysical bondage in its own right.

I see you Laika
soft on your belly

Laika
I see you underhand
I see you underfoot
I see you underground
taken care of by worms

hidden behind large paws
you never asked for
dear Laika

and to think, you once said
if creation seems fit to smile on the small is this a quote? from whom?
then what trouble is seven years after all?

[a vermits]

It's not a quote. I just made it up.

[addy]

Sorry I wasn't clear. I only meant to ask who was "you" in "you once said...". The story revolved around Laika having no voice, so I was curious.