02-09-2026, 02:49 AM
speaking in whispers
with voices deeper than bones
old ghosts have returned
with voices deeper than bones
old ghosts have returned
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speaking in whispers
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02-09-2026, 02:49 AM
speaking in whispers
with voices deeper than bones old ghosts have returned
02-09-2026, 08:14 AM
(02-09-2026, 02:49 AM)Mark A Becker Wrote: speaking in whispersHey Mark. Assuming you want to adhere to 5-7-5, a few quick thoughts... "their voices..." might be less of a filler word than "with voices" also "returning" rather than "have returned" - for both filler word and tense
02-09-2026, 11:21 AM
I really like this short form poem. I read Tigers suggestions and I feel adding the present tense "returning" at the end adds a sense of urgency I really like in the poem. Regardless I definitely felt very drawn in and wonder if it has a title?
Thanks for the post
Only one thing is impossible for God: To find any sense in any copyright law on the planet.
--mark twain Bunx |
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