Useful Idleness

[brynmawr1]

Useful Idleness

I sit on my patio watching
how the world breathes
 
to understand the wind
how it teaches the leaves
 
about rain and the bloom
of the white peony, why
 
it kneels under its weight
at each spring’s renewal
 
from this patio I hope
to be of little consequence
 
I remember the world
how it caught us in breath
 
we all were contained, how
sweetly we breathed newly found
 
air so quickly cleaned however briefly
we became of little consequence
 
still the world breathes despite
Aleppo, Gaza, Mariupol, Tel Aviv
 
the world knows how children die
in the streets when small men cry
 
fearing how the wind whispers
you are of little consequence
 
from my patio I see a world
unsure why the peony kneels
 
listening to the wind writing
poems of little consequence.

the idea of S10 came from another poem

[busker]

“ from this patio I hope
to be of little consequence”

Is the poem. It doesn’t aspire to be great.
Love it.

[brynmawr1]

Thanks to all that have read and commented, especially those that appeared from the aether for the single purpose, seemingly, of remarking before disappearing into the vapors again.
Bryn

---

“ from this patio I hope
to be of little consequence”

Is the poem. It doesn’t aspire to be great.
Love it.

Busker,
I was close to ending to poem at that line even after it was fully written.  It might happen yet.
Thanks for reading and commenting.
Bryn

[adagio]

I was close to ending to poem at that line even after it was fully written.  It might happen yet.

---

Yes, I too think this poem could be shorter. Maybe recombine the couplets somehow to keep the best ones?

[nana]

Useful Idleness

I sit on my patio watching
how the world breathes
 
to understand the wind
how it teaches the leaves
 
about rain and the bloom
of the white peony, why    Really good use of alliteration 
  
it kneels under its weight
at each spring’s renewal
 
from this patio I hope
to be of little consequence
 
I remember the world
how it caught us in breath
 
we all were contained, how
sweetly we breathed newly found
 
air so quickly cleaned however briefly
we became of little consequence
 
still the world breathes despite
Aleppo, Gaza, Mariupol, Tel Aviv
 
the world knows how children die
in the streets when small men cry
 
fearing how the wind whispers
you are of little consequence
 
from my patio I see a world
unsure why the peony kneels
 
listening to the wind writing
poems of little consequence.

the idea of S10 came from another poem

I like how the poem is consistent in its metaphor from the beginning to the end. It was a very stripped down poem which was refreshing and it flowed really well with the message you are trying to pass on.