when a spider dies

[Nutkins]

when a spider dies
nobody cries

there're no tearful eyes
as it slowly dries

frozen in the moment
before becoming dead
feet clasped in prayer
hanging by a thread

when a spider dies
nobody cries

least of all 
the flies!

[brynmawr1]

when a spider dies

when a spider dies
nobody cries

they're no tearful eyes   I think you mean 'there're'? I might just get rid of the conjunction.  The change in meter is insignificant, IMO.
as it slowly dries

frozen in the moment
before becoming dead
feet clasped in prayer
hanging by a thread

when a spider dies
nobody cries

least of all 
the flies!

Hi Nutkins,
Welcome to the Pen.  A humorous piece.  A couple of comments.  Maybe a different title since it's the first line, though can be done at writer's discretion.  Also, why the italics for S3? Is it a quote from somewhere else?  I looked it up, maybe from Whitman's "Song of Myself"?  Anyway, I might try to go for full symmetry and end with beginning placing another stanza between S3 and S4 and cutting last stanza.  "Hanging by a thread" does seem to have some spiritual significance that I didn't investigate.   The rhyme works pretty well, IMO.
Looking forward to more,
Bryn

[busker]

I presume you're the same person who posted this in frozen in https://www.writingforums.com/threads/wh...es.180228/ ?
S3 is nice, can't tell why it's italicised

[Nutkins]

Thank you Bryn - 

The italics only indicate a different rhyme scheme. But to save confusion I've changed them back - and fixed the typo.
I don't think I can ditch the punch-line for the sake of some padding - this is brevity...
'hanging by a thread' is a whopping cliche........................N