That’s all

[busker]

That’s all

When I thought I loved you
it wasn’t you at all
but sunshine on the heath,
a swan gliding in the pond,
flagstones like ancient tragedies -
that’s all there was to it - 
nothing much at all.

Also a secondhand bookshop
with Baudelaire in French.
A book I carried in my pocket through a squall
under thick trees thrashing 
in the Hackney marshes.
Then washed towers, waving 
branches, accident-
al symphonies
in gardens and in waterfalls.

That’s all there was to it
- nothing more to it,
that’s all.

[Knot]

.
Hi Busker,
not sure the structure and 'refrain' work. The enjambment after 'squall' confuses (me, at least), and it feels slightly repetitive (thrashing trees / waving branches), but the tone works very well and I particularly like the 'accidental symphonies'. Should polish up nicely (with perhaps some elaboration of 'gardens'?).


By way of a nudge.


When I thought I loved you
it wasn’t you at all
but sunshine on the heath,
swans gliding in the pond,
a secondhand bookshop
with Baudelaire in French.
rain-washed tower blocks
flagstones like ancient tragedies
a squall on the Hackney marshes.
accidental symphonies
in gardens and water
falling. That’s all there was to it
- nothing much at all.


Best, Knot

.

[busker]

Knot - some good comments there.
This one sat on my phone for a while and reached the state where it couldn’t be improved without losing some of the original positives
So maybe sometime in the future I’ll be able to revise it and edit the crappy parts. But I wanted to get out there because I also use this site as a notebook.