Monday Poem

[TranquillityBase]

After a Sunday
of self-inflicted discord
just before waking
I dreamed I was composing a poem
it struggled to materialize
unconciousness kept hold of it
but one word escaped:
"appleyard".

Monday's dawn

after a Sunday

of self-inflicted discord

I dreamed a poem.

All that's left is one word:

"appleyard".







Before dawn 

after a Sunday

of self-inflicted discord

my unconscious churned out

a poem now lost.

All that’s left is one word:

“appleyard”.

[busker]

JustBefore dawn …… detail not relevant, I feel 
after a Sunday
of self-inflicted discord
my unconscious churned out ….. this and the next line take up too much space to say too little. Compress?

a poem now lost.
All that’s left is one word: …..the rhythm feels off. “What’s left is just one…” etc?
“appleyard”.  ……. Have this as the title?

[TranquillityBase]

JustBefore dawn …… detail not relevant, I feel 
after a Sunday
of self-inflicted discord
my unconscious churned out ….. this and the next line take up too much space to say too little. Compress?

a poem now lost.
All that’s left is one word: …..the rhythm feels off. “What’s left is just one…” etc?
“appleyard”.  ……. Have this as the title?

Thanks Busker.  A clearer ( I hope) if not more concise version posted.

[Knot]

.
Hi TqB,
just a thought.

after a long Sunday
of self-inflicted discord
Just before waking
all I remember
is I dreamed a poem ..................... I want a little more detail here
of which one word remains .............. must be a better way of phrasing this
"apple yard"


Best, Knot

.

[TranquillityBase]

.
Hi TqB,
just a thought.

after a long Sunday
of self-inflicted discord
Just before waking
all I remember
is I dreamed a poem ..................... I want a little more detail here
of which one word remains .............. must be a better way of phrasing this
"apple yard"


Best, Knot

.

Thanks Knot.  Did a rewrite.  It was "appleyard", which I just googled and it's primarily an English surname.  The only "appleyard" I knew of, before the the dream, was the character in Picnic at Hanging Rock, so I'm guessing the dream's origins lie there.  Maybe I was dreaming of disappearing like those girls.  Or a nightmare about revision