Dignitas

[LiteraryAntiquity]

Dignitas.

The colonoscopy,
lobotomy,
biopsy,
elegy,
eulogy,
epitaph.
Forget it,
take me under,
my neurological slippers
to cut my feet on my insanity.
Bones are breaking on laxatives and piles form on dislocation.
Bang my ball against the resin floor.
I implore you from my glass cage.
The antibodies do not fight
like your white suited manikins.
The procotoscopy.
culdoscopy,
otoscopy,
neoplasm,
mitosis,
chemotherapy.
Forget it,
bury me under
mirrors of surgeons.
Be my medical proxy, travel-ticket.
Radiology and melanoma are stitches
to a cross pattern of old.
Smash this sickness, like a snowball, against the back of my head.
I implore you from my glass cage.
Goodbye meticulous world of wet-eyed prayer.
Ripen me under injections for the murderer
and take me there.

[billy]

Dignitas.

The colonoscopy,
the lobotomy,
the biopsy,
the elegy,
the eulogy,
the epitaph. are all the 'the's' needed?
Forget it,
take me under,
my neurological slippers great line
to cut my feet on my insanity. is the 2nd my needed?
Bones are breaking on laxatives and piles form on dislocation.
Bang my ball against the resin flooring. would floor be better
I implore you, from my glass cage. no need of comma
The antibodies do not fight great line
like your white suited manikins. great line
The procotoscopy
the culdoscopy,
the otoscopy,
the neoplasm,
the mitosis,
the chemotherapy. are all the 'the's' needed?
Forget it,
bury me under
mirrors of surgeons.
Be my medical proxy, travel-ticket.
Radiology and melanoma are stitches
to a cross pattern of old.
Bang my head against the resin flooring. feels lame after it's 1st use
I implore you, from my glass cage.
Goodbye meticulous world of wet-eyed prayer.
Ripen me under injections for the murderer
and take me there.

wow.

that said i've been instructed to do a two paragraph crit.
i love what you have going on here LA. i've marked out a few nits above. the worst being the resin floor reiteration.
the imagery works well, really well in fact. and the content is for me as original is gets.

too many lines to pick just one or two, the whole ending just worked so well for me. after having a 6th read of it i came to conclusion that all the 'the's' weren't adding anything to what for me is a really strong piece.

It seems like a lot of stuff is marked on the poem but reallly they're extremely minor things, though still worthy of pointing out (i think so )
i think this is one of my fave poems. thanks as always for the read. (jmo)

nice title too. fits in perfectly with the poem.