Time Flies When You're Having Fun

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Time Flies When You're Having Fun

71degrees Offline

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Actually rather good at it

Posts: 443
Threads: 99
Joined: Sep 2013

#1

04-23-2015, 03:43 AM

Yesterday not here
anymore, today will do
until tomorrow

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RiverNotch Offline

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WTF

Posts: 1,147
Threads: 466
Joined: Nov 2013

#2

04-25-2015, 02:58 AM

I like the drag of "Yesterday's" more, and maybe an em dash or something instead of a comma. Otherwise, neat.

[Video: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=9Qgwfm9NUY8]

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justlikeyou
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#3

10-06-2015, 08:31 AM

(04-23-2015, 03:43 AM)71degrees Wrote: Yesterday not here
anymore, today will do
until tomorrow

Forgive my play with your poem but it inspired me.

Yesterday is gone
Now is all there ever is
In the future too.

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