Posts: 444
Threads: 285
Joined: Nov 2011
![[Image: gardens.jpg]](http://wordbiscuit.com/im9/gardens.jpg)
< gardens >
we had wanted to be gardens
filled
with flowers and bees
industrious
to fit into this world
at the joyful places
the bright connections
- - -
Image: "Expectations" - Ray Heinrich
Photos of separate tulips, leaves, and various denizens collaged, multiplied, mirrored, color substituted, gamma-adjusted, paint-filled, touched-up, dimensionally distorted, re-scanned, and licked by a cat.
a brightly colored fungus that grows in bark inclusions
just mercedes
Unregistered
Wow! Unexpected colour, nice. I like the poem too, especially '... the joyful places
the bright connections'
Posts: 848
Threads: 231
Joined: Oct 2012
The poem makes me think of the need to be accepted to be part of something established, for some reason I see it as a couple moving to a new country trying to fit in. Last two lines are great they add a dimension that reads of socialising having a good time found that uplifting as it's much more than a need to fit in. My only nit would be I wanted to know more of the out come. Nice pic too Ray. Best Keith
If your undies fer you've been smoking through em, don't peg em out
Posts: 444
Threads: 285
Joined: Nov 2011
(11-13-2015, 05:14 PM)just mercedes Wrote: Wow! Unexpected colour, nice. I like the poem too, especially '... the joyful places
the bright connections'
Those are my favorite lines as well.
(11-14-2015, 04:45 AM)Keith Wrote: The poem makes me think of the need to be accepted to be part of something established, for some reason I see it as a couple moving to a new country trying to fit in. Last two lines are great they add a dimension that reads of socialising having a good time found that uplifting as it's much more than a need to fit in. My only nit would be I wanted to know more of the out come. Nice pic too Ray. Best Keith
Yes. I wrote this after visiting a child with terminal cancer; seeing another
in the room as well. So now you know the outcome. I know this doesn't come across
in the poem. I couldn't actually get the literal version of the poem to work, so I settled
for this more abstract edited-down version. Damn poems.
a brightly colored fungus that grows in bark inclusions
Posts: 444
Threads: 285
Joined: Nov 2011
(11-20-2015, 07:13 AM)Gormind Wrote: Hey rayheinrich,
when i read this poem it made me feel like you're writing about a person in your past who you felt intimate with and shared the same feelings with. Perhaps another perspective would be the society as whole felt this way, or children who want to grow up and thinking about how great it will be to be adults.
All three work for me; definitely valid interpretations. What's especially good about all three
is they capture the element of loss, of great expectations that have, or probably will be, unfulfilled.
Poems can be such mean little things...
Thanks for commenting,
Ray
a brightly colored fungus that grows in bark inclusions
Posts: 580
Threads: 71
Joined: Oct 2015
the last 2 lines are strange heartbreak.
Posts: 444
Threads: 285
Joined: Nov 2011
(11-20-2015, 05:39 PM)ronsaik Wrote: the last 2 lines are strange heartbreak.
I love your term: "strange heartbreak".
What a great title for a poem (or novel, for that matter).
a brightly colored fungus that grows in bark inclusions
