Boom! Boom!

[Namyh]

Boom ! Boom !

I felt hot and sticky as a moon pie stuck
on a old pickup sunbaked Chevy
and the battle bruised air in my soot laden lungs
made the morning taste of gunpowder heavy.

All my ammo was gone ! And all the rifles were gone !
All the mortar rounds were missing with our gear
and we saw the enemy scramble in confusion.
Seems their weapons too had also disappeared.

But our Supply Sarge, unsupplied, had a bold plan.
He knew a way that we yet still could win the day.
Using a Positive Mental Attitude at its full force,
all the battles could be fought with PMA.

He said "Pretend I'm handing you a loaded rifle.
When you see the enemy, think and go Bang! Bang!
and a knife for close encounters when they happen
and Stab! Stab! will drop your foe yet once again."

On the field, I had no choice. I thought Bang! Bang!
and heard the click of ejected shells from fired rounds.
And in shock, I knew my PMA was working dead on target
'cause I saw my enemy shot and hit the ground.

I thought I heard a sound, not far out in the distance,
as we revelled in the enemy's loss and doom
’cause the Bang! Bangs! and the Stab! Stabs! were loud all thru the day
'til a big sound shook the ground. It went Boom! Boom!

Boom! Boom! I heard in the distance. Bang! Bang! sounded small.
Boom! Boom! sounded nearer. Stab! Stab! no sound at all.
And I saw an enemy soldier, with PMA strong you see,
saying "Tankity-Tank, Tankity-Tank." Boom! Boom! rolled over me.

Hurt, I watched the Boom! Boom! explode on a bomb from air
launched by a comrade soldier's PMA, unmeasured and rare.
Boom! Boom! seemed unusual and maybe a little farfetched
'til I saw our soldier flying in air saying "Jettidy, Jet, Jet, Jet.”

And I raised my head in pain from mud with tears that looked at sky
for Man’s mind was on display, uncaged by belief to fly.
If only he could live with his neighbor and not be socially retarded at core,
such gifts could aim at stars for targets than Death, the bullseye of War.

Namyh

[Brownlie]

I stopped the critiquing once I read for fun on the top ribbon.

Boom ! Boom !  --What's the deal with boom anyway? What actually goes boom?

I felt hot and sticky as a moon pie stuck
on a old pickup sunbaked Chevy -- "an old." Plus,  I don't think you need pickup and sunbaked Chevy.
and the battle bruised air in my soot laden lungs

made the morning taste of gunpowder heavy. -- gunpowder heavy is an inversion.

All my ammo was gone ! And all the rifles were gone !
All the mortar rounds were missing with our gear
and we saw the enemy scramble in confusion.
Seems their weapons too had also disappeared.

But our Supply Sarge, unsupplied, had a bold plan.
He knew a way that we yet still could win the day.
Using a Positive Mental Attitude at its full force,
all the battles could be fought with PMA.

He said "Pretend I'm handing you a loaded rifle.
When you see the enemy, think and go Bang! Bang!
and a knife for close encounters when they happen
and Stab! Stab! will drop your foe yet once again."

On the field, I had no choice. I thought Bang! Bang!
and heard the click of ejected shells from fired rounds.
And in shock, I knew my PMA was working dead on target
'cause I saw my enemy shot and hit the ground.

I thought I heard a sound, not far out in the distance,
as we revelled in the enemy's loss and doom
’cause the Bang! Bangs! and the Stab! Stabs! were loud all thru the day
'til a big sound shook the ground. It went Boom! Boom!

Boom! Boom! I heard in the distance. Bang! Bang! sounded small.
Boom! Boom! sounded nearer. Stab! Stab! no sound at all.
And I saw an enemy soldier, with PMA strong you see,
saying "Tankity-Tank, Tankity-Tank." Boom! Boom! rolled over me.

Hurt, I watched the Boom! Boom! explode on a bomb from air
launched by a comrade soldier's PMA, unmeasured and rare.
Boom! Boom! seemed unusual and maybe a little farfetched
'til I saw our soldier flying in air saying "Jettidy, Jet, Jet, Jet.”

And I raised my head in pain from mud with tears that looked at sky
for Man’s mind was on display, uncaged by belief to fly.
If only he could live with his neighbor and not be socially retarded at core,
such gifts could aim at stars for targets than Death, the bullseye of War.

Namyh

I remember reading some of that Gravity's Rainbow  book in high school. The missile was very phallic.  This is sort of interesting, but I'm not sure what a bomb blast would say. It would probably be the end before I knew enough to care about it.

[Namyh]

Brownlie – Look at this way. When you’re lucky to wake up in the morning after a heavy mortar bombardment night fight, nothing feels or tastes the same. It’s all heavy on your surviving senses. “Boom”, for a better word, is the blast front sound from the bomb going off. Stand outside the front and you’ll hear it. Stand inside it and you won’t. It could be the last inversion of your day. So glad you decided to have fun with this and I hope it helps when needed. I wrote this to show that man may be technologically proficient but historically he is still socially retarded proven by his inability to get along with his neighbor next door, across the street or across the ocean without eventually going to war to settle a dispute. We’ve proven ourselves capable of so much more since we’ve graduated after 7 million evolutionary years from being dumb on our way to getting smart with an aim at one day becoming wise. Thanks for stopping by to enjoy Brownlie. Namyh