Subfuscous - A Word of the Day Poem

[Erthona]

Subfuscous - A Word of the Day Poem
Written for Milo, with depth to give him more
than one read through and in accentual verse
to drive him crazy.

His punkish mind was mimicked by
a subfuscous attire,
instead of seeking sanity
he sought a rabid fire.
Upon all Hallows eve he danced
with others in the rave,
he had no way to realize
he was dancing t’ward his grave.
 
Merry Christmas the Bells rang out,
Merry Christmas to all indeed, 
to all subfuscous sort of folk*
who think Santa Clause should bleed.
 
–Erthona
 

*Teenagers

Now write your own poem using the word subfuscous, and post it below.
©2014

[billy]

milo thinks everyone should bleed, i had to look up the word.

[Erthona]

Of course you had to look up the word, if I had known the word, I wouldn't have written a poem about it. There were several days, three in a row where I did know the word, so I didn't write a poem, because I thought the word was too common.
Well it got quite a few looks but no one stayed to play. That's why Marcella should do these, they like her. Plus she takes the time to write a better poem. Oh well, some things are just not meant to be.


Dale

[milo]

Subfuscous - A Word of the Day Poem
Written for Milo, with depth to give him more
than one read through and in accentual verse
to drive him crazy.

His punkish mind was mimicked by
a subfuscous attire,
instead of seeking sanity
he sought a rabid fire.
Upon all Hallows eve he danced
with others in the rave,
he had no way to realize
he was dancing t’ward his grave.
 
Merry Christmas the Bells rang out,
Merry Christmas to all indeed, 
to all subfuscous sort of folk*
who think Santa Clause should bleed.
 
–Erthona
 

*Teenagers

Now write your own poem using the word subfuscous, and post it below.
©2014

I do like it when I get a mention in a thread . . .

[Erthona]

Tale of Memories,

Yes to the first part, but more of the second.

Milo milo,

Ah ha, made you surface. This is a present not easily opened, but a gift that keeps on giving  I didn't want you to feel it was worth only one read through. Not anywhere near the standards of my better work, but better than the viridescent pablum I have been putting out...well, Tom knows what I mean  

Have an uneventful secular holiday period, and wishing you total avoidance of all you find distasteful, although I know that is probably impossible. Although it does seem lighter this year... 

Dale

*viridescent - word of the day for 12/23/2014

I could tell the religionist were viridescent* with envy, or at least the men were, when they found that I could prey upon whatever succulent female morsel I choose without receiving any obligation for my pleasure; while they were stuck with the ever expanding corpulent voice of "God" that hardly let them catch a breath without permission. These selfsame wives of these poor men, had they the power to bring it about would have settled for nothing less than my crucifixion. Such is the normal redress for anything that threatens the body of Christ... upon which they constantly march endlessly(hopefully his loins are girded).
A question I have never been able to resolve is this: if Christ were real, and for sake of argument we will say he was, then we must also accept that he was also a human male, that is to say, a man. Now, this is what puzzles me. Knowing how men are, even the least of them, even the most Casper Milquetoast of them can only take so much whining and complaining from a woman before they explode and have a heart attack or something else. Yet Christ, who as we have ascertained is a man, has for the last 2000 plus years been having to listen to millions upon millions of women constantly complain, under the guise of prayer, informing him exactly what is wrong with the world and what he needs to do to fix it, and why has he not done so yet, and that they are getting more disheartened and losing faith that he has not acted and given them a sign. Certainly we must assume Christ is beyond the power of any normal man, especially if he is still sane and keeping the heaven show going up there, or over there, or where ever it is, and he has yet to blow his top and have a heart attack or destroy the universe. I think the repercussion of either would clue us that something had happened. As it has not, it must be that Christ, although he is a man, and listening to all these millions of nagging women for thousands of years has not blown his top. This more than any miracle, or vision, that he could do this and not go completely bonkers compells me to say with John Wayne, "Surely this was the Son O God."         

[ellajam]

Silly, everyone knows that men aren't really listening to the nagging, just silently waiting til it's over and going on their way.

[Sub]

Damn I actually really liked this, not sure if you intended for it but I had a pretty clear picture in my head of what was being conveyed and there was a rhythm but once again this is through my perspective so apologies if it's far from what is somewhat correct.
Keep it up

[Erthona]

Ellamyfella wrote:"Silly, everyone knows that men aren't really listening to the nagging, just silently waiting til it's over and going on their way."

Technically they may not be listening, but it still has the same effect as nails on a chalkboard. My limit is three years before, for self-preservation sake,  I have to manipulate the woman into leaving me   Actually two and a half years, as the first half year I am in love with the woman so that nothing she does irritates me, after that goes away, everything she does irritates me. Of course living with me is no cake walk, as I am nearly impossible to manipulate, and attempts to do so piss me off. I know it would go easier on me if I just played the game but... Of course most women aren't even aware of how manipulative they are. I'm not saying manipulation is a bad thing. It's not like they can usually physically overpower a man, so they have to use cunning, which, from my perspective seems to generally work much better than physical force, plus it is legal. Once a woman can no longer be cowed by the threat of physical or financial force, a man has been virtually declawed. What fun games we play    
_________________________________________________________________________________________________________
Sub,

Well, you didn't say enough of anything to determine correct or incorrect, but whatever you could have said I would have been OK with. I have a fairly thick skin. Besides if you are referring to the last little bit of prose, I wrote that spur of the moment, without any editing. So it's not as though it's a well crafted piece of literature, more a semi-literate rant, but I am gratified if you liked it. I appreciate that you commented on this thread, but I just want you to know, this will not count as one of your five critiques to get out of newbie status or whatever they call it, where you can post a poem somewhere other than in newly registered forum, plus your comments will need to have significantly more critical substance. If you need to know what that mean, browse the three critical forums, "Novice Poet and Critic," "Poems For Mild Critique," or "Serious Workshopping" to get an idea. It is also in those forums that you will need to comment to have your five critiques count. Welcome to the site.

Dale