Backward - edit

[ray]

Revised

At seven they reckon you’re too old
for adoption. I look on your head
so underwhelming and lost within
that bicycle helmet, behind
four years in letters and numbers;
your inside out and backward dress
patterned with pie and snot and think
on all the words that you’ve forgot
before we’ve even turned the page
on doors slammed shut and fingers bit,
the kicks of three-year-old strops and spit
now surely that must count for something?
 
 Original

At seven they reckon you’re too old
for adoption. I look on your head
so underwhelming and lost within
that bicycle helmet, behind
four years in reading and writing;
your inside out and backward dress
patterned with pie and snot and think
on all the words that you’ve forgot
before we’ve even turned the page,
on doors slammed shut and fingers bit,
the kicks of three-year-old strops and spit
now surely that must count for something?

 
 

[Leanne]

This is such a poignant poem, and quite personal to me as these are the students I teach, when they near the end of their high school days and someone suddenly realises that the world has failed to make them part of it.

As the poem moves on you place greater emphasis on rhyme, both internal and end-rhyme, which helps create a quickening -- this comes to an abrupt end with your rhetorical question, which is not my favourite way to end a poem, but it does work here. I'd love to see a small reference to numbers or maths dropped in a little earlier to link to "count". Personally I'd be tempted to put a colon after "spit" and change the last line to a statement, such as "that counts for something".

I'd stick a comma at the end of L2 and remove the one at the end of L9.

Excellent use of the word "backward", blending image and concept together perfectly. Nicely done, Ray.

[ray]

Thanks, Leanne. Good suggestion about numbers/ count, I've tried to do that and removed a comma at the end of line 9.

the kicks of three-year-old strops and spit
now surely that must count for something?
At one point I had the last line in italics, spit is meant to be ambiguous, issuing from both adult and child.

[brandontoh]

I enjoyed reading the poem! My gripes are mostly nitpicks, so yeah, hope my comments are helpful! 

Revised

At seven they reckon you’re too old
for adoption. I look on your head
so underwhelming and lost within -- 'Underwhelming' is not an ideal word choice in my opinion. The idea of being less than ideal is already illustrated really well in the rest of the poem, so the slot for an adjective is kind of wasted here. Personally I think 'oblivious' would add another layer to the characterisation of the child, but that may not be what you're going for. It's your poem. =)
that bicycle helmet, behind
four years in letters and numbers; -- I like the change to 'letters and numbers'. It makes the image clearer, though it does sacrifice the rhyme with line 7.
your inside out and backward dress
patterned with pie and snot and think
on all the words that you’ve forgot
before we’ve even turned the page -- I had to read lines 7-9 multiple times due to the strange syntax, which I'll assume is deliberate. It serves to speed up the reading of the poem and to introduce a more chaotic and confused feel to it, so if that's what you're going for it's very effective. Also, For line 9, I think that 'before the page was even turned' is a possible edit. The poem's focus is on the child and the use of  'we' detracts from that focus slightly.
on doors slammed shut and fingers bit,
the kicks of three-year-old strops and spit
now surely that must count for something? -- Although the last line end the poem very nicely, I can't help but feel that for a poem with such a melancholic feel, the phrasing of this line takes something away from that. I would suggest taking away the word 'now', because that word kind of introduces a slightly uplifting tone to the line.
 
 Original

At seven they reckon you’re too old
for adoption. I look on your head
so underwhelming and lost within
that bicycle helmet, behind
four years in reading and writing;
your inside out and backward dress
patterned with pie and snot and think
on all the words that you’ve forgot
before we’ve even turned the page,
on doors slammed shut and fingers bit,
the kicks of three-year-old strops and spit
now surely that must count for something?

 
 

[ray]

Thanks, brandontoh. I used underwhelming because the child is microcephalous.

before the page was even turned - yes, I see the value in that, may use it. Ta.

I use now  in the final line because the poem is meant to be a rebuttal of those who aver that 7 is too old for adoption. By showing how the child is not 7 at all, developmentally, I hope to convince them of their error. Like a lawyer concluding his case! Didn't work.