The Wild Wind

[Erthona]

Call it what it is, reversed syntax. English is a Germanic language although 60% of the words in English are derived from Old French. The reversed syntax came as a result of the Norman (French) invasion of 1066. To impress the French court poets wrote sonnets in English, but often reversed the syntax to sound "high falutin", like it came from the french court. Writing strictly in IP can often seem to force one into reverse syntax, as it is also not native to English, however this poem is not written in IP, but in "accentual tetrameter" as it is primarily devoid of any consistent meter; as such there is really no excuse for reversed syntax other than as an affectation, that is to make it "sound" more poetic like. I would advise avoiding it, just as I would advise avoid not capitalizing all "i"'. There is simply no rationalization for it, and it is affectation pure and simply.

Dale

[LorettaYoung]

grons?? runns?? fild ??

There is a lot of repetition. There are a number of rhymes which seem forced. Full lines are cut in half example:

"Hear the wild wind,
his musical roar
As he sweeps from the north
and kisses the moor
he sings of adventure
and grons to allure"

Hear the wild wind, his musical roar,
as he sweeps from the north and kisses the moor.
He sings of adventure and grons to allure

I am assuming "grons" is suppose to be "groans", if so "groans to allure" makes little sense making "allure" and "moor" a forced rhyme.

If written in accentual verse, instead of meter, the first stanza (lined out the way I have it), has four stresses per line, making them four foot lines, or tetrameter. Which would be fine, except you abandon this pattern by stanza 2.

This seems mildly imitative of Shelly's "Ode to the West Wind".

Going off beat, or off stress is common with those new to poetry, who have a vague sense of the stressed syllables in a poem, and are able to imitate that for a brief time, but then lose it at times, then at times come back to the pattern, which is what is happening here. About the same thing can be said of the rhyming pattern, which seems to be trying to rhyme every other line starting with the second line, but this pattern falters at times or forces the rhyme. Were it lined out as I have above, the lines would be in rhyming couplets, more or less (see below).

On the positive side, the writer can hear the stresses, and can rhyme. If the spelling errors were corrected, the lines written in tetrameter, and the forced rhymes removed, it would not be a bad effort. After stanza 2, the lines fall fairly well.

Example

ride the wild wind as he seeks through your sill
the spice of your kiss and the gift of your will
making wild merry disturbing the sheets
wreaking wild laughter an erotic feast

ride the wild wind whenever you can
over wild raging seas and mountain blessed land
to unusual places of exotic reports
let the wild winds enlighten your thoughts

Of course punctuation would add to making the reading less difficult.

Maybe if the writer lines out the poem as I have shown, it will be easier to see (hear) which line are too short or too long.

Best,


Dale

---

I have read your comments again and taken notes; I am unsure about where you mean the stressors are in the first verse. What about free verse, I've felt that as long as it flows it shouldn't matter which lines rhyme
I am a little confused about punctuation, another comment suggested I remove some commas, I am going to study all your precious comments and study the post about form. Thanks again, very much. In reality, the poem is not about wind, it's about choices and integrity in life. Loretta

[abu nuwas]

Loretta, I cannot compete with Dale and his tetrameters (by which he means four feet to the line), but when I read this, making allowances for what I assume to be your American way of pronouncing some words, I heard a good deal of rhythm, and it reminded me of Sir Walter Scott's 'Lochinvar', like this:

Lochinvar



''O young Lochinvar is come out of the west,
Through all the wide Border his steed was the best;
And save his good broadsword he weapons had none,
He rode all unarm'd, and he rode all alone.''


Or eve this one, of rather the same period:

''The Assyrian came down like the wolf on the fold,
And his cohorts were gleaming in purple and gold;
And the sheen of their spears was like stars on the sea,
When the blue wave rolls nightly on deep Galilee.''

They have good old rolling ring to them, yet, in fact, if you look at the meter carefully, in each, it rather changes, or jumps about. The writers could do that because they had an ear for what was right. For us amateurs, the best advice, on properly metered writing, rhyme or no, is to get one form running through your head say iambic tetrameter, that is, 4 x de DA. Then words will tend to slot in quite naturally, and if there is an extra half foot here or there, so much the better.

As for Shelley, never mind him: he was a fine poet, but he can't have a monopoly on the wind....

---

But I'm still not sure what you mean about feet and tetrameter? Iambic, 4Xde DA? Loretta

There are different types of ''feet'' which is just what the most basic unit is called in poetic meter. S0 -- I imagine your name goes 'lor-ET-a' with the stress on the middle syllable? If so, you might write:

LorET /ta IS/ the BEST/ of ALL/ deDA deDA deDA deDA . That makes four deDAs. A deDA is called an iamb, and 'tetra' means four, so iambic tetrameter means a meter where there are four iambs in a line. If there were five, it would be iambic pentameter; or three, is trimeter.

A trochee is the reverse of an iamb. Instead of deDA, it is DAde like this:

MIlo/ IS a/ POet (three trochees = trochaic trimester)

But by all means use the info on the site.

[LorettaYoung]

From a novice to a newb, hello there, and welcome to the site! Now, dale pretty much illuminated all the points I was going to make, so it would be redundant to state them. Inversion, meter, and other metrical tools are his forte.

I am intrigued by the content. One thing about poem crafting that I find depressing is how cliched everything is. I mean, the wildness of the wind has been a recurring theme since thousands of years ago. How can you write freshly on a beautiful theme when the Greeks did it in the Odyssey?

I honestly belive that, at some point, you have to stop giving a damn what other people think. That's not to say you shouldn't regard it, as you should, but when you recognize that a perfectly fine poem will be crushed down just because the theme is overused, which is unavoidable given the epochs that poetry has been around, then you can take a deep breath, relax, and offer your own unique take on a subject combined with excerpts from history.

The Wild Wind

Hear the wild wind, his musical roar This is an Aeolian harp
as he sweeps from the north and kisses the moor sweeps and kisses work nice. sweeps give you this idea of dust flying off the moor while it's getting kissed
he sings of adventure and groans to allureUm, no, a groaning wind is usualy spooky. a groaning person, however, can be alluring
riding the hills in his splendid grandeur Here's where it hits cliche, and that is perfectly okay. It really says something that, througout human history, people have been so entranced by the wind, it's freedom and wildness. Repeating the theme doesn't extenuate a cliche; rather, it emphasises a culturally important theme. If aliens, or future historians, look back at the ruin of our culture, then they will see that we, as have others before us, and doubtless they, have this feeling of freedom and majesty attached to the wind.

Here is the poem Riding the Wind Together by Heather Burns.

I can actually read the first stanza and get a perfect tetrameter out of it. The iambs and trochees bounce around a bit, but it still sounds right. I have no idea if that opinion can be verified, though.

Inhale the depth of the wild salt air
as he runs his wild fingers through your wind-tossed hair
watch the wild wind as he blows through the streets
tossing dead leaves that once dwelt in peacenot sure if tetrameter
swaying the lanterns the street corners keep One time I tried to take a lantern from a street corner, and it bit me

Ocean winds and city winds add tactile feel to any work of prose or poetry, from The Ryme of the Ancient Mariner by Coleridge to A Tale of Two Cities by Dickens. It gives a sense of chill and foreboding, or it can give a sense of calm and refreshing

ride the wild wind as he seeks through your sill
the spice of your kiss and the gift of your will
making wild merry disturbing the sheets
wreaking will laughter in an erotic feast

This stanza doesn't work. It's inverted all to hell, for the sake of rhyming. Also, again, there is nothing sensual about a blast of wind through your window, it's more annoying than anything else. Try something like "he will ruin your bedding, and before he has passed,/you will see him wreaking laughter in a manic blast" (the meter doesn't work with that, but meh. just something less inverted, more natural). You might consider just deleting this stanza, it's long-winded.

Ride the wild wind whenever you can
over wild raging seas and mountain blessed land delete "wild"
to unusual places, of exotic reports
let the wild winds, enlighten your thoughts no comma, and What? Enlightenment is the concept of stillness and peace, but I can see how you might mean that the wind makes you think about things more

When I read this stanza, I get transported to the garden of the golden apple from the Chronicles of Narnia by C.S. Lewis. It brings a rush of childhood memories, soaring with the pegasi, so wild, wild and free, living life so antisocially.

Reap the wild wind, a pure breath of life like in the book of genesis, where God breathes life into people
the fruit of the day, when it is ripe Como?
there is only in(one) question, this moment in time
be it sublime, or a threadbare dead rhyme ok, what's that have to do with the wind?

Reap the wild wind,
come what may,
for death at you grins at how silly this inverted sentence is
from an open doorway yes, but I'm sure he was grinning when he rang the doorbell
g.e.Kaye[...]

I don't know, I see the link between reap/Death scythe, but in general the wind is associated with life and purity, not death and decay.

---

Thank you kind of a hippie, if true, me too. The poem is really not about the wind; it's about choices, where we can go, experience, freedom, openness. Death to me is always a consideration in life forces, choices; and hence also refers to enlightenment; I'm sure a walk on the moon was a wild one and enlightening and they sure were riding the wild wind. Thanks again, Loretta

---

From a novice to a newb, hello there, and welcome to the site! Now, dale pretty much illuminated all the points I was going to make, so it would be redundant to state them. Inversion, meter, and other metrical tools are his forte.

I am intrigued by the content. One thing about poem crafting that I find depressing is how cliched everything is. I mean, the wildness of the wind has been a recurring theme since thousands of years ago. How can you write freshly on a beautiful theme when the Greeks did it in the Odyssey?

I honestly belive that, at some point, you have to stop giving a damn what other people think. That's not to say you shouldn't regard it, as you should, but when you recognize that a perfectly fine poem will be crushed down just because the theme is overused, which is unavoidable given the epochs that poetry has been around, then you can take a deep breath, relax, and offer your own unique take on a subject combined with excerpts from history.

The Wild Wind

Hear the wild wind, his musical roar This is an Aeolian harp
as he sweeps from the north and kisses the moor sweeps and kisses work nice. sweeps give you this idea of dust flying off the moor while it's getting kissed
he sings of adventure and groans to allureUm, no, a groaning wind is usualy spooky. a groaning person, however, can be alluring
riding the hills in his splendid grandeur Here's where it hits cliche, and that is perfectly okay. It really says something that, througout human history, people have been so entranced by the wind, it's freedom and wildness. Repeating the theme doesn't extenuate a cliche; rather, it emphasises a culturally important theme. If aliens, or future historians, look back at the ruin of our culture, then they will see that we, as have others before us, and doubtless they, have this feeling of freedom and majesty attached to the wind.

Here is the poem Riding the Wind Together by Heather Burns.

I can actually read the first stanza and get a perfect tetrameter out of it. The iambs and trochees bounce around a bit, but it still sounds right. I have no idea if that opinion can be verified, though.

Inhale the depth of the wild salt air
as he runs his wild fingers through your wind-tossed hair
watch the wild wind as he blows through the streets
tossing dead leaves that once dwelt in peacenot sure if tetrameter
swaying the lanterns the street corners keep One time I tried to take a lantern from a street corner, and it bit me

Ocean winds and city winds add tactile feel to any work of prose or poetry, from The Ryme of the Ancient Mariner by Coleridge to A Tale of Two Cities by Dickens. It gives a sense of chill and foreboding, or it can give a sense of calm and refreshing

ride the wild wind as he seeks through your sill
the spice of your kiss and the gift of your will
making wild merry disturbing the sheets
wreaking will laughter in an erotic feast

This stanza doesn't work. It's inverted all to hell, for the sake of rhyming. Also, again, there is nothing sensual about a blast of wind through your window, it's more annoying than anything else. Try something like "he will ruin your bedding, and before he has passed,/you will see him wreaking laughter in a manic blast" (the meter doesn't work with that, but meh. just something less inverted, more natural). You might consider just deleting this stanza, it's long-winded.

Ride the wild wind whenever you can
over wild raging seas and mountain blessed land delete "wild"
to unusual places, of exotic reports
let the wild winds, enlighten your thoughts no comma, and What? Enlightenment is the concept of stillness and peace, but I can see how you might mean that the wind makes you think about things more

When I read this stanza, I get transported to the garden of the golden apple from the Chronicles of Narnia by C.S. Lewis. It brings a rush of childhood memories, soaring with the pegasi, so wild, wild and free, living life so antisocially.

Reap the wild wind, a pure breath of life like in the book of genesis, where God breathes life into people
the fruit of the day, when it is ripe Como?
there is only in(one) question, this moment in time
be it sublime, or a threadbare dead rhyme ok, what's that have to do with the wind?

Reap the wild wind,
come what may,
for death at you grins at how silly this inverted sentence is
from an open doorway yes, but I'm sure he was grinning when he rang the doorbell
g.e.Kaye[...]

I don't know, I see the link between reap/Death scythe, but in general the wind is associated with life and purity, not death and decay.

---

Thank you kind of a hippie, if true, me too. The poem is really not about the wind; it's about choices, where we can go, experience, freedom, openness. Death to me is always a consideration in life forces, choices; and hence also refers to enlightenment; I'm sure a walk on the moon was a wild one and enlightening and they sure were riding the wild wind. Thanks again, Loretta

---

From a novice to a newb, hello there, and welcome to the site! Now, dale pretty much illuminated all the points I was going to make, so it would be redundant to state them. Inversion, meter, and other metrical tools are his forte.

I am intrigued by the content. One thing about poem crafting that I find depressing is how cliched everything is. I mean, the wildness of the wind has been a recurring theme since thousands of years ago. How can you write freshly on a beautiful theme when the Greeks did it in the Odyssey?

I honestly belive that, at some point, you have to stop giving a damn what other people think. That's not to say you shouldn't regard it, as you should, but when you recognize that a perfectly fine poem will be crushed down just because the theme is overused, which is unavoidable given the epochs that poetry has been around, then you can take a deep breath, relax, and offer your own unique take on a subject combined with excerpts from history.

The Wild Wind

Hear the wild wind, his musical roar This is an Aeolian harp
as he sweeps from the north and kisses the moor sweeps and kisses work nice. sweeps give you this idea of dust flying off the moor while it's getting kissed
he sings of adventure and groans to allureUm, no, a groaning wind is usualy spooky. a groaning person, however, can be alluring
riding the hills in his splendid grandeur Here's where it hits cliche, and that is perfectly okay. It really says something that, througout human history, people have been so entranced by the wind, it's freedom and wildness. Repeating the theme doesn't extenuate a cliche; rather, it emphasises a culturally important theme. If aliens, or future historians, look back at the ruin of our culture, then they will see that we, as have others before us, and doubtless they, have this feeling of freedom and majesty attached to the wind.

Here is the poem Riding the Wind Together by Heather Burns.

I can actually read the first stanza and get a perfect tetrameter out of it. The iambs and trochees bounce around a bit, but it still sounds right. I have no idea if that opinion can be verified, though.

Inhale the depth of the wild salt air
as he runs his wild fingers through your wind-tossed hair
watch the wild wind as he blows through the streets
tossing dead leaves that once dwelt in peacenot sure if tetrameter
swaying the lanterns the street corners keep One time I tried to take a lantern from a street corner, and it bit me

Ocean winds and city winds add tactile feel to any work of prose or poetry, from The Ryme of the Ancient Mariner by Coleridge to A Tale of Two Cities by Dickens. It gives a sense of chill and foreboding, or it can give a sense of calm and refreshing

ride the wild wind as he seeks through your sill
the spice of your kiss and the gift of your will
making wild merry disturbing the sheets
wreaking will laughter in an erotic feast

This stanza doesn't work. It's inverted all to hell, for the sake of rhyming. Also, again, there is nothing sensual about a blast of wind through your window, it's more annoying than anything else. Try something like "he will ruin your bedding, and before he has passed,/you will see him wreaking laughter in a manic blast" (the meter doesn't work with that, but meh. just something less inverted, more natural). You might consider just deleting this stanza, it's long-winded.

Ride the wild wind whenever you can
over wild raging seas and mountain blessed land delete "wild"
to unusual places, of exotic reports
let the wild winds, enlighten your thoughts no comma, and What? Enlightenment is the concept of stillness and peace, but I can see how you might mean that the wind makes you think about things more

When I read this stanza, I get transported to the garden of the golden apple from the Chronicles of Narnia by C.S. Lewis. It brings a rush of childhood memories, soaring with the pegasi, so wild, wild and free, living life so antisocially.

Reap the wild wind, a pure breath of life like in the book of genesis, where God breathes life into people
the fruit of the day, when it is ripe Como?
there is only in(one) question, this moment in time
be it sublime, or a threadbare dead rhyme ok, what's that have to do with the wind?

Reap the wild wind,
come what may,
for death at you grins at how silly this inverted sentence is
from an open doorway yes, but I'm sure he was grinning when he rang the doorbell
g.e.Kaye[...]

I don't know, I see the link between reap/Death scythe, but in general the wind is associated with life and purity, not death and decay.

---

Thank you kind of a hippie, if true, me too. The poem is really not about the wind; it's about choices, where we can go, experience, freedom, openness. Death to me is always a consideration in life forces, choices; and hence also refers to enlightenment; I'm sure a walk on the moon was a wild one and enlightening and they sure were riding the wild wind. Thanks again, Loretta

---

From a novice to a newb, hello there, and welcome to the site! Now, dale pretty much illuminated all the points I was going to make, so it would be redundant to state them. Inversion, meter, and other metrical tools are his forte.

I am intrigued by the content. One thing about poem crafting that I find depressing is how cliched everything is. I mean, the wildness of the wind has been a recurring theme since thousands of years ago. How can you write freshly on a beautiful theme when the Greeks did it in the Odyssey?

I honestly belive that, at some point, you have to stop giving a damn what other people think. That's not to say you shouldn't regard it, as you should, but when you recognize that a perfectly fine poem will be crushed down just because the theme is overused, which is unavoidable given the epochs that poetry has been around, then you can take a deep breath, relax, and offer your own unique take on a subject combined with excerpts from history.

---

Thank you kind of a hippie, if true, me too. The poem is really not about the wind; it's about choices, where we can go, experience, freedom, openness. Death to me is always a consideration in life forces, choices; and hence also refers to enlightenment; I'm sure a walk on the moon was a wild one and enlightening and they sure were riding the wild wind. Thanks again, Loretta

---

From a novice to a newb, hello there, and welcome to the site! Now, dale pretty much illuminated all the points I was going to make, so it would be redundant to state them. Inversion, meter, and other metrical tools are his forte.

I am intrigued by the content. One thing about poem crafting that I find depressing is how cliched everything is. I mean, the wildness of the wind has been a recurring theme since thousands of years ago. How can you write freshly on a beautiful theme when the Greeks did it in the Odyssey?

I honestly belive that, at some point, you have to stop giving a damn what other people think. That's not to say you shouldn't regard it, as you should, but when you recognize that a perfectly fine poem will be crushed down just because the theme is overused, which is unavoidable given the epochs that poetry has been around, then you can take a deep breath, relax, and offer your own unique take on a subject combined with excerpts from history.

The Wild Wind

Hear the wild wind, his musical roar This is an Aeolian harp
as he sweeps from the north and kisses the moor sweeps and kisses work nice. sweeps give you this idea of dust flying off the moor while it's getting kissed
he sings of adventure and groans to allureUm, no, a groaning wind is usualy spooky. a groaning person, however, can be alluring
riding the hills in his splendid grandeur Here's where it hits cliche, and that is perfectly okay. It really says something that, througout human history, people have been so entranced by the wind, it's freedom and wildness. Repeating the theme doesn't extenuate a cliche; rather, it emphasises a culturally important theme. If aliens, or future historians, look back at the ruin of our culture, then they will see that we, as have others before us, and doubtless they, have this feeling of freedom and majesty attached to the wind.

Here is the poem Riding the Wind Together by Heather Burns.

I can actually read the first stanza and get a perfect tetrameter out of it. The iambs and trochees bounce around a bit, but it still sounds right. I have no idea if that opinion can be verified, though.

Inhale the depth of the wild salt air
as he runs his wild fingers through your wind-tossed hair
watch the wild wind as he blows through the streets
tossing dead leaves that once dwelt in peacenot sure if tetrameter
swaying the lanterns the street corners keep One time I tried to take a lantern from a street corner, and it bit me

Ocean winds and city winds add tactile feel to any work of prose or poetry, from The Ryme of the Ancient Mariner by Coleridge to A Tale of Two Cities by Dickens. It gives a sense of chill and foreboding, or it can give a sense of calm and refreshing

ride the wild wind as he seeks through your sill
the spice of your kiss and the gift of your will
making wild merry disturbing the sheets
wreaking will laughter in an erotic feast

This stanza doesn't work. It's inverted all to hell, for the sake of rhyming. Also, again, there is nothing sensual about a blast of wind through your window, it's more annoying than anything else. Try something like "he will ruin your bedding, and before he has passed,/you will see him wreaking laughter in a manic blast" (the meter doesn't work with that, but meh. just something less inverted, more natural). You might consider just deleting this stanza, it's long-winded.

Ride the wild wind whenever you can
over wild raging seas and mountain blessed land delete "wild"
to unusual places, of exotic reports
let the wild winds, enlighten your thoughts no comma, and What? Enlightenment is the concept of stillness and peace, but I can see how you might mean that the wind makes you think about things more

When I read this stanza, I get transported to the garden of the golden apple from the Chronicles of Narnia by C.S. Lewis. It brings a rush of childhood memories, soaring with the pegasi, so wild, wild and free, living life so antisocially.

Reap the wild wind, a pure breath of life like in the book of genesis, where God breathes life into people
the fruit of the day, when it is ripe Como?
there is only in(one) question, this moment in time
be it sublime, or a threadbare dead rhyme ok, what's that have to do with the wind?

Reap the wild wind,
come what may,
for death at you grins at how silly this inverted sentence is
from an open doorway yes, but I'm sure he was grinning when he rang the doorbell
g.e.Kaye[...]

I don't know, I see the link between reap/Death scythe, but in general the wind is associated with life and purity, not death and decay.

---

Thank you kind of a hippie, if true, me too. The poem is really not about the wind; it's about choices, where we can go, experience, freedom, openness. Death to me is always a consideration in life forces, choices; and hence also refers to enlightenment; I'm sure a walk on the moon was a wild one and enlightening and they sure were riding the wild wind. Thanks again, Loretta

---

From a novice to a newb, hello there, and welcome to the site! Now, dale pretty much illuminated all the points I was going to make, so it would be redundant to state them. Inversion, meter, and other metrical tools are his forte.

I am intrigued by the content. One thing about poem crafting that I find depressing is how cliched everything is. I mean, the wildness of the wind has been a recurring theme since thousands of years ago. How can you write freshly on a beautiful theme when the Greeks did it in the Odyssey?

I honestly belive that, at some point, you have to stop giving a damn what other people think. That's not to say you shouldn't regard it, as you should, but when you recognize that a perfectly fine poem will be crushed down just because the theme is overused, which is unavoidable given the epochs that poetry has been around, then you can take a deep breath, relax, and offer your own unique take on a subject combined with excerpts from history.

---

Thank you kind of a hippie, if true, me too. The poem is really not about the wind; it's about choices, where we can go, experience, freedom, openness. Death to me is always a consideration in life forces, choices; and hence also refers to enlightenment; I'm sure a walk on the moon was a wild one and enlightening and they sure were riding the wild wind. Thanks again, Loretta

---

From a novice to a newb, hello there, and welcome to the site! Now, dale pretty much illuminated all the points I was going to make, so it would be redundant to state them. Inversion, meter, and other metrical tools are his forte.

I am intrigued by the content. One thing about poem crafting that I find depressing is how cliched everything is. I mean, the wildness of the wind has been a recurring theme since thousands of years ago. How can you write freshly on a beautiful theme when the Greeks did it in the Odyssey?

I honestly belive that, at some point, you have to stop giving a damn what other people think. That's not to say you shouldn't regard it, as you should, but when you recognize that a perfectly fine poem will be crushed down just because the theme is overused, which is unavoidable given the epochs that poetry has been around, then you can take a deep breath, relax, and offer your own unique take on a subject combined with excerpts from history.

---

Thank you kind of a hippie, if true, me too. The poem is really not about the wind; it's about choices, where we can go, experience, freedom, openness. Death to me is always a consideration in life forces, choices; and hence also refers to enlightenment; I'm sure a walk on the moon was a wild one and enlightening and they sure were riding the wild wind. Thanks again, Loretta

---

---

Thank you kind of a hippie, if true, me too. The poem is really not about the wind; it's about choices, where we can go, experience, freedom, openness. Death to me is always a consideration in life forces, choices; and hence also refers to enlightenment; I'm sure a walk on the moon was a wild one and enlightening and they sure were riding the wild wind. Thanks again, Loretta

---

From a novice to a newb, hello there, and welcome to the site! Now, dale pretty much illuminated all the points I was going to make, so it would be redundant to state them. Inversion, meter, and other metrical tools are his forte.

I am intrigued by the content. One thing about poem crafting that I find depressing is how cliched everything is. I mean, the wildness of the wind has been a recurring theme since thousands of years ago. How can you write freshly on a beautiful theme when the Greeks did it in the Odyssey?

I honestly belive that, at some point, you have to stop giving a damn what other people think. That's not to say you shouldn't regard it, as you should, but when you recognize that a perfectly fine poem will be crushed down just because the theme is overused, which is unavoidable given the epochs that poetry has been around, then you can take a deep breath, relax, and offer your own unique take on a subject combined with excerpts from history.

The Wild Wind

Hear the wild wind, his musical roar This is an Aeolian harp
as he sweeps from the north and kisses the moor sweeps and kisses work nice. sweeps give you this idea of dust flying off the moor while it's getting kissed
he sings of adventure and groans to allureUm, no, a groaning wind is usualy spooky. a groaning person, however, can be alluring
riding the hills in his splendid grandeur Here's where it hits cliche, and that is perfectly okay. It really says something that, througout human history, people have been so entranced by the wind, it's freedom and wildness. Repeating the theme doesn't extenuate a cliche; rather, it emphasises a culturally important theme. If aliens, or future historians, look back at the ruin of our culture, then they will see that we, as have others before us, and doubtless they, have this feeling of freedom and majesty attached to the wind.

Here is the poem Riding the Wind Together by Heather Burns.

I can actually read the first stanza and get a perfect tetrameter out of it. The iambs and trochees bounce around a bit, but it still sounds right. I have no idea if that opinion can be verified, though.

Inhale the depth of the wild salt air
as he runs his wild fingers through your wind-tossed hair
watch the wild wind as he blows through the streets
tossing dead leaves that once dwelt in peacenot sure if tetrameter
swaying the lanterns the street corners keep One time I tried to take a lantern from a street corner, and it bit me

Ocean winds and city winds add tactile feel to any work of prose or poetry, from The Ryme of the Ancient Mariner by Coleridge to A Tale of Two Cities by Dickens. It gives a sense of chill and foreboding, or it can give a sense of calm and refreshing

ride the wild wind as he seeks through your sill
the spice of your kiss and the gift of your will
making wild merry disturbing the sheets
wreaking will laughter in an erotic feast

This stanza doesn't work. It's inverted all to hell, for the sake of rhyming. Also, again, there is nothing sensual about a blast of wind through your window, it's more annoying than anything else. Try something like "he will ruin your bedding, and before he has passed,/you will see him wreaking laughter in a manic blast" (the meter doesn't work with that, but meh. just something less inverted, more natural). You might consider just deleting this stanza, it's long-winded.

Ride the wild wind whenever you can
over wild raging seas and mountain blessed land delete "wild"
to unusual places, of exotic reports
let the wild winds, enlighten your thoughts no comma, and What? Enlightenment is the concept of stillness and peace, but I can see how you might mean that the wind makes you think about things more

When I read this stanza, I get transported to the garden of the golden apple from the Chronicles of Narnia by C.S. Lewis. It brings a rush of childhood memories, soaring with the pegasi, so wild, wild and free, living life so antisocially.

Reap the wild wind, a pure breath of life like in the book of genesis, where God breathes life into people
the fruit of the day, when it is ripe Como?
there is only in(one) question, this moment in time
be it sublime, or a threadbare dead rhyme ok, what's that have to do with the wind?

Reap the wild wind,
come what may,
for death at you grins at how silly this inverted sentence is
from an open doorway yes, but I'm sure he was grinning when he rang the doorbell
g.e.Kaye[...]

I don't know, I see the link between reap/Death scythe, but in general the wind is associated with life and purity, not death and decay.

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Thank you kind of a hippie, if true, me too. The poem is really not about the wind; it's about choices, where we can go, experience, freedom, openness. Death to me is always a consideration in life forces, choices; and hence also refers to enlightenment; I'm sure a walk on the moon was a wild one and enlightening and they sure were riding the wild wind. Thanks again, Loretta

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From a novice to a newb, hello there, and welcome to the site! Now, dale pretty much illuminated all the points I was going to make, so it would be redundant to state them. Inversion, meter, and other metrical tools are his forte.

I am intrigued by the content. One thing about poem crafting that I find depressing is how cliched everything is. I mean, the wildness of the wind has been a recurring theme since thousands of years ago. How can you write freshly on a beautiful theme when the Greeks did it in the Odyssey?

I honestly belive that, at some point, you have to stop giving a damn what other people think. That's not to say you shouldn't regard it, as you should, but when you recognize that a perfectly fine poem will be crushed down just because the theme is overused, which is unavoidable given the epochs that poetry has been around, then you can take a deep breath, relax, and offer your own unique take on a subject combined with excerpts from history.

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Thank you kind of a hippie, if true, me too. The poem is really not about the wind; it's about choices, where we can go, experience, freedom, openness. Death to me is always a consideration in life forces, choices; and hence also refers to enlightenment; I'm sure a walk on the moon was a wild one and enlightening and they sure were riding the wild wind. Thanks again, Loretta

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From a novice to a newb, hello there, and welcome to the site! Now, dale pretty much illuminated all the points I was going to make, so it would be redundant to state them. Inversion, meter, and other metrical tools are his forte.

I am intrigued by the content. One thing about poem crafting that I find depressing is how cliched everything is. I mean, the wildness of the wind has been a recurring theme since thousands of years ago. How can you write freshly on a beautiful theme when the Greeks did it in the Odyssey?

I honestly belive that, at some point, you have to stop giving a damn what other people think. That's not to say you shouldn't regard it, as you should, but when you recognize that a perfectly fine poem will be crushed down just because the theme is overused, which is unavoidable given the epochs that poetry has been around, then you can take a deep breath, relax, and offer your own unique take on a subject combined with excerpts from history.

---

Thank you kind of a hippie, if true, me too. The poem is really not about the wind; it's about choices, where we can go, experience, freedom, openness. Death to me is always a consideration in life forces, choices; and hence also refers to enlightenment; I'm sure a walk on the moon was a wild one and enlightening and they sure were riding the wild wind. Thanks again, Loretta

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Thank you kind of a hippie, if true, me too. The poem is really not about the wind; it's about choices, where we can go, experience, freedom, openness. Death to me is always a consideration in life forces, choices; and hence also refers to enlightenment; I'm sure a walk on the moon was a wild one and enlightening and they sure were riding the wild wind. Thanks again, Loretta

I happen to like the 2nd stanza; aside from the wind seeping through a crack in the sill what else is wrong with it? Thanks Loretta

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Hi, LY, welcome. Here's a link that explains Basic Meter.

You can also check the individual threads in the Poetry Exercises forum for explanations of specific forms.

[Erthona]

Stressed means accented. If there are 4 accented syllables, but they do not fall into any particular meter, as Abu has delineated, then in English poetry we simply count the accents without regard to how many non-accented syllables there are. This is called accentual verse. In metered verse we count both the accented and non-accented syllables, and they have to be in a consistent order. A sonnet (except for dilettantes and heathens) is generally written in iambic pentameter; a line consisting of five iambs (see Abu's example above of iambs).

Dale

[LorettaYoung]

Stressed means accented. If there are 4 accented syllables, but they do not fall into any particular meter, as Abu has delineated, then in English poetry we simply count the accents without regard to how many non-accented syllables there are. This is called accentual verse. In metered verse we count both the accented and non-accented syllables, and they have to be in a consistent order. A sonnet (except for dilettantes and heathens) is generally written in iambic pentameter; a line consisting of five iambs (see Abu's example above of iambs).

Dale

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Taking notes; thank you Erthona; this is a lot more complicated than I imagined; and I put considerable time and effort into my brief works disregarding all this structure. I read poetry from our local artsy magazine, live in Woodstock, lots of art, and the poetry seems to have almost no form; i find it choppy and difficult to read, free form everything! Thanks again, can't say it enough; I think you guys are wonderful! Loretta

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Taking notes; thank you Erthona; this is a lot more complicated than I imagined; and I put considerable time and effort into my brief works disregarding all this structure. I read poetry from our local artsy magazine, live in Woodstock, lots of art, and the poetry seems to have almost no form; i find it choppy and difficult to read, free form everything! Thanks again, can't say it enough; I think you guys are wonderful! Loretta