Life on a flower

[aerickson]

If we lived on a flower,
we'd all need a shower,
'cuz we'd all be covered
in bright yellow powder

[ChristopherSea]

Aaachew! That yellow powder is killing me and I am nowhere near a flower.

[Namyh]

aerickson - If I lived on a flower and was ready for yellow powder lovemaking, I would say bring on the water and let there be rain. I'm ready for boot knocking of the botanical kind. LOL. Nice work putting a lot into a little Ae. Namyh

[Mlatu]

I really like the subject matter, and the truth of your poem. It's something that many would describe as a "shower thought". I don't like the sing-songy nature of it; it sounds like the subject matter is based on the rhyme and not the other way around.

[Thoughtjotter]

If we lived on a flower,
we'd all need a shower,
'cuz we'd all be covered
in bright yellow powder

It is a sweet short poem, be proud of it.
Try it with out abbreviations.
This reminds me of a poem that I wrote many years ago:
"If I had a nickle,
I would buy a pickle.
the pickle I would eat.
then,
I would not have my pickle
or a nickle for a treat"
Sorry about that, see how your poetry can be contagious!
Keep up the good work,
R T

[aerickson]

Thank you all for your comments! Bring on spring!