Rainbows Are Apparent Illusions Too

[rowens]

A bird is a turd
falling out of the cracked glass of God.
Our world is an eye
where angels swim
in a cataract of facts.

She looks up to the sky
for a warning or a blessing,
a message from a star
or some clear cut sign from science.

But the sky is all blue,
the birds remain human;
and she can't see anything,
not even her own reflection,
after staring into the sun.

[ellajam]

ha, I liked this one, too. A bird is a turd cracked me up, I'm used to birds darting, gliding, and swooping, this was a delightful change.
But in context,


A bird is a turd
falling out of the cracked glass of God.
Our world is an eye
where angels swim
in a cataract of facts.

is more a full-blown sob than a laugh. I find it startlingly beautiful.

Can you explain your use of italics?

[rowens]

I have many versions of this. I'm not sure this is my favorite.

Some versions had the word sky used several times, so I used italics to emphasis the line that says she looks up. It was more comical at that point. Then I changed the italics around too. Decided to keep them, but change them. I decided I wanted those lines read with more emphasis.

Sometimes I want italics to emphasize; other times I want them to almost de-emphasize, in a kind of phasing in and out effect.

[ellajam]

In this poem the italics didn't work for me. The first 2 seem to break the phrase in the middle (maybe your point but I just don't get it), and in the third instance not even her own reflection the line seems weighty enough on its own.

just my 2 cents.

[rowens]

a message from a star, that line I read both trying to emphasize and de-emphasize at the same time; mostly de-emphasize it compared to the lines surrounding it that de-emphasize themselves. And it mostly has to do with intonation when I'm reading it out loud. Though a crooked kind of emphasis.

I have a specific way of reading it, but do the italics wreck the poem?

[ellajam]

a message from a star, that line I read both trying to emphasize and de-emphasize at the same time; mostly de-emphasize it compared to the lines surrounding it that de-emphasize themselves. And it mostly has to do with intonation when I'm reading it out loud. Though a crooked kind of emphasis.

I have a specific way of reading it, but do the italics wreck the poem?

Personally I find the italics a distraction.
I'm not in a place where I can try it out loud, I'll give it a go later.

[rowens]

It's a hushed emphasis.

[ellajam]

ha, I'll try out how to do that.

[ChristopherSea]

Those seagulls are real turds, they try to get me every summer! Nice grabbing opener, within a superior stanza. Loved the use of cracked glass and cataract. You poem made me hear the Fuel song, 'Walk the Sky'.

[Jim Steele]

This is one of those instances where I can't quite put my finger on why I love this so much, I just do - especially that first stanza. Angels swimming in a cataract of facts - that image was my favourite part of the whole poem.