The Black Widow edit one

[jdguyb]

It can sense your fear, what other mysteries are there?
The black widow is not to be underestimated, beware.
It's powerful unrelenting venom coming from a pair,
of fangs so sharp they pierce the skin, take extra care.

Convulsions and muscle contractions are the danger,
of a bite so powerful it is to be feared and approached
cautiously, it will attack anyone, any mortal stranger.
This animal is so deadly it shouldn't be at all encroached.

It's victims aren't ready for its evil weaved web trap.
Flies and even mice don't know what there entering,
when they enter the web's sticky dark diabolical wrap.
Soon they will be lifeless, all hope gone, and festering.

So take extra heed when approaching this dark soul.
It is not to be played with, for it is unrelenting and powerful.
Do not come close to this evil force or you will take your final toll.
The animal inside is planning its attack ever so graceful.

Original

It can sense your fear, what other's mysteries are there?
The black widow is not to be underestimated, beware.
It's powerful unrelenting venom coming from a pair,
of fangs so sharp they pierce the skin, take extra care.

Convulsions and muscle contractions are the danger,
of a bite so powerful it is to be feared and approached
cautiously, it will attack anyone, any mortal stranger.
This animal is so deadly it shouldn't be at all encroached.

It's victims aren't ready for its evil weaved web trap.
Flies and even mice don't know what there entering,
when they enter the webs sticky dark diabolical wrap.
Soon they will be lifeless, all hope gone, and festering.

So take extra heed when approaching this dark soul.
It not to be played with, for it is unrelenting and powerful.
Do not come close to this evil force or you will take your final toll.
The animal inside is planning its attack ever so graceful.

[Volaticus]

It can sense your fear, what other's mysteries are there? Did you mean 'other'?
The black widow is not to be underestimated, beware.
It's powerful unrelenting venom coming from a pair, 'Its' or 'it's'. I suppose it can work either way. I think you can remove the comma here, and instead have it after 'venom'. But I think it depends on whether you mean "its" or "it's".
of fangs so sharp they pierce the skin, take extra care.

Convulsions and muscle contractions are the danger, Don't think you need the comma here. Perhaps move it to the next line after 'bite'
of a bite so powerful it is to be feared and approached I stumbled in this line. The rhyme felt forced
cautiously, it will attack anyone, any mortal stranger.
This animal is so deadly it shouldn't be at all encroached. Stumbled here too, and the rhyme felt forced.

It's victims aren't ready for its evil weaved web trap. 'Its'. Not sure about 'evil weaved web trap'. Seems a bit over the top
Flies and even mice don't know what there entering, 'they're'
when they enter the webs sticky dark diabolical wrap. Did you mean 'web's' or "webs'"?
Soon they will be lifeless, all hope gone, and festering.

So take extra heed when approaching this dark soul.
It not to be played with, for it is unrelenting and powerful. Did you mean 'it is not'?
Do not come close to this evil force or you will take your final toll.
The animal inside is planning its attack ever so graceful.

Hi,
Great idea for a poem. There are some typos and some repetition I think you could sort out. Some of the lines say practically the same. I've left some notes for you to use or lose. JMHO of course.
-LB

[Amphilyon]

Hey Jdguyb,
I'd make similar grammatical notes as LB did, so i'll just refer to his post on that matter. I must say, reading the lines where You've put together the end of the line and the starting of a new line (S1L3-S1L4, S2L2-S2L3) made me stumble. It might be something i personally simply do not prefer, but reading a line through to it's end feels like a "small, finished unit", and when words are entangled (like "approached cautiously") it feels a bit unnatural. Again, it might be simply something i myself dislike.

With that said, the idea to write a poem about The Black Widow is intriguing. Making an "inner" rhyme with words "close" and "force" in S4L3 really stood out for me.
"Do not come close to this evil force or you will take your final toll."