07-18-2012, 12:15 PM
I found when reading this, that the sharpness of word usage worked well to show the poets almost 'choked up' guilt at not being able to do more, as if in the telling of the this, it has new, raw emotion that is still being felt. Stanza 3, 'in blood she whispered' I keep wanting to hear screamed, because to me 'cutting' is a big cry for help. really liked 'all she had was impotent rage and shards of glass' fab image. I think you did a good job showing pain of both girl and poet 