12-21-2009, 03:08 PM
This was beautiful, you have a way with words. And you're much better than me at phrasing so can't really comment on that.
i guess the only thing that stood out to me was the line "unseen yet felt" on the third stanza... what was unseen? Was it sorrow? Though the poem mentions that you cry. But anyway that's very very minor.
i guess the only thing that stood out to me was the line "unseen yet felt" on the third stanza... what was unseen? Was it sorrow? Though the poem mentions that you cry. But anyway that's very very minor.
PS. If you can, try your hand at giving some of the others a bit of feedback. If you already have, thanks, can you do some more?