soulstice edit 1 billy, erthona

[tectak]

Each dawn’s bright rise is but a turn, a cyclic twist of blinking earth;
The living count each passing day, clicked by a ratchet hooked by time.
But we below have run the race, and sense but seasons in our bones;
a winter comes, a summer next, spring and autumn barely touch.
Lagging warmth, slow risen, peaks: then drains so gently into ground.

The quick, above, entranced by life, enthralled by futures promised fair,
will come to yearn the fast embrace, the dreaming kiss of endless night.
That you know not what death can bring, nor care to know, nor dare to guess,
is all the better whilst you stir, and all the better when you die.
This the secret no one tells, why none return to clarify.

Ask not the question “What of me?”, for whilst you stride the changing plane,
your footsteps pulse upon your fate, and deep in darkness souls vibrate;
a friend or two, a brother lost, a father grieved, a mother mourned,
a lover once, but now long gone, a worshipped wife, a much loved son.
This is the way, the course, of life: and this is the longest day.

Tectak
The summer solstice
June 2012

though small, the edit adds something to the poem. count works better than feel; the dreaming kiss of endless night also feels better. so yes, it works

Thanks for that billy.
I have sneeked in a couple of person changes to appease that old mould erthona. The guy grows on you like penicillin....you know he does you good but can cause allergic reactions!
If I put this one to bed now it won't be too soon.
thanks again. Good workshopping.
Best,
tectak